Theology

Why I Love Luther

christianity, theology

I never used to like history. I thought it was boring. I used to hate knowing different theologies of different people. I thought it was a waste of time. All I wanted to do was love on teens, and give them the gospel.

But I’m loving history more and more, and loving learning about theology more and more (so much I now minor in it).  I groaned at the thought of taking “History of Christianity” this semester, but let me tell you–my heart is changed. I am fascinated.

The other night I read about Martin Luther. I’ve read about his guy 30487 times, but something really hit me the other night.  Luther wanted so badly to obtain salvation.  He desired more than anything not to go to hell and to have a restored standing in God’s eyes.  Luther went on pilgrimages, beat himself, and was constantly confessing his sins to become closer to God.  I can’t even begin to wrap my mind around it.  In his quest, he ended up denying the church’s means of atonement through indulgences.  Luther desired God so much that he even spoke out against the church’s practices and began a movement of reformation.  And this inspires me.  Do I desire the Lord that much?  What have I done that shows this?

A Radical Christianity

christianity, jesus

I read Radical by David Platt a few weeks ago, and I have been processing it.  This book has seriously changed my life and my way of thinking.  I encourage you to read it.


The book is about how we, as “followers of Christ”, haven’t been following the real Christ.  We have been following our own, Americanized Jesus that we have crammed into our quest for the American Dream.  We have molded Jesus into our own image and rationalize his words in order to fit ours.



When Jesus called his disciples, he called for them to drop everything and follow him.  People would come up to him and ask, “What does it take to follow you?”  And Jesus would tell them to sell all of their things, leave their careers, not even go back and tell their families goodbye, and completely leave their whole life behind.  We read these stories and go, “Yeah, Jesus, I could do that for you!”  However we know that Jesus would never ask us to sell everything to follow him.  Jesus doesn’t want us to be poor and starve to death!  And Jesus would never ask us to leave our families behind.  Who else is going to take care of them?  Jesus would never ask us to be uncomfortable.


Lies.


Jesus constantly told them that they were going to endure hardships in order to follow him.  They had to suffer if they were going to follow him properly.  But do we?  I wrote a post a year ago (exactly) entitled, “Finally Understanding What it Means to Die to Self,” and although my insight was good, and I was learning a lot at that time in my life, I did not indeed fully understand what it meant.


What are you going to have to do in order to follow Jesus?  What is it going to take?  Is Jesus really asking all of his followers to become hobos and forget their families in order to follow him?  Surely not, at least that’s what we hope.  So then no one steps up and lives radically so that another person might live eternally.  We have grown up being told that we must attain the highest status of money, status, and material things possible.  But that’s the complete OPPOSITE of Jesus’ message!

So what are we to do?  What are you to do?  I can’t tell you what you specifically are supposed to do.  I encourage you to read the book and read the Gospels and have a serious talk with the Lord about what it is going to look like for you to live radically.  I am going to share some of the things that I am going to do:


Sacrifice my money.  First and foremost, I’m going to make sure that I tithe, no matter what.  Secondly, I am going to refrain from buying things that I do not need.  I have never had very much money; by America’s standards I am classified as low-class and always have been.  If you know much about how I grew up, you would know that my dad has not had heating in his house for the last 3 years (including when that foot of snow hit there last week).  But even though I am considered dirt-poor by our American standards, I am still richer than 75% of the world just because I have a roof over my head and clothes on my back.  What am I going to do in order to sacrifice my money–sacrifice it, meaning giving it in a manner that hurts me in order to glorify the kingdom?  I sponsored a child last year through Compassion, but had to give it up because I couldn’t afford it anymore.  But I cut down on my phone bill and now have an itty bitty plan, and I am going to go deeper.  I’m not sure what that looks like completely.  I’m thinking a few things–donating my money to people’s mission trips, starting random acts of kindness for people, keeping money for when someone I know needs money and just giving it to them (paying it forward; I can’t tell you how many times I have been blessed by anonymous donations when I was strapped).  I’m also going to put a lot of money into my next point:


Go overseas.  I have made up excuses for a long time on this one, and I am honestly still terrified (and this is coming from someone who loves learning about other cultures!).  I am going to go on a mission trip overseas. Before Jesus ascended into heaven, he said, “Go and make disciples of all nations…”  I have always read this and added at the end, “if you’re called!” and I know many who do the same.  But I am convicted that it is my responsibility to go overseas and preach the Good News.  Does this mean that I am abandoning my calling to innercity ministry?  No.  It means that I am going to other nations and not just sticking in my comfortable bubble.  In order for me to leave my comforts and follow Christ in a radical way, I need to go overseas.


Leave my family.  I read this book while I was visiting my family for Christmas, and it convicted me and caused a week straight of crying while I was home.  My family has been a stumbling block for me for a long time now.  My parents do not have relationships with Christ, as far as I can tell by their fruits and lifestyles.  I am constantly being weighed down by them.  I have noticed for the past few years that when I am around them, I get the most selfish and most “un-Christlike”.  This is due to their lifestyles’ impact, as well as the pressure of being Christ-like, as well as many other factors I’m sure.  I have realized that it is almost impossible for me to be a “good Christian” around them.  I try so hard, but I can’t do it.  In order for me to follow Christ, I need to leave my family.  This doesn’t mean I’m never going to talk to them ever again, that’s not what I’m saying.  I need to become completely dependent on God and quit being dependent on them.  Luke 14:26 says, “If anyone comes to me and does not hate father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters—yes, even their own life—such a person cannot be my disciple. ”  As much as I love my family, my love for them needs to look like hatred compared to my love for Christ.  Am I willing to take a bullet or a beating for my little sister?  What more am I prepared to endure for Christ?  That bullet needs to look like I’m getting a daisy compared to what I’m willing to go through for my Lord.  So I’m going to detach myself.  I’m going to focus on trying to figure out what it looks like to follow Christ.  I’m not going to base my identity on how often my mom doesn’t call me, or trying to win over my grandma’s love, or being my sister’s parent.  This is the hardest decision I have ever made, but it is necessary for me to follow Christ.


This message of “Give up absolutely everything that is comfortable in order to follow me” is completely different from “Admit, Believe, Confess!” that we hear in our churches.  We read the gospels and say to ourselves, “Jesus didn’t really mean that we have to give up everything.  Just that we should be willing to.  It’s figurative.”  Oh, is it?  Are you willing to bet on it?  Is that a risk you are willing to take?

Mirror, Mirror

christianity, god, identity

What if my relationship with the mirror “reflected” my relationship with God?

(hahahaha, I had to make that pun)

I was thinking about this tonight as I was preparing to go out–how many times do you look in the mirror?  When you get up in the morning and get ready, you spend a good thirty or so minutes  in front of the mirror.  When you brush your teeth that two or three times a day, you look in the mirror.  How about each time you use the bathroom, do you check yourself out in the mirror while washing your hands?  Before you leave to go somewhere, quick look in the mirror to make sure there are no blemishes or marks or food on your face?  And even when just passing one of the many mirrors around us, take a look?  Pull out your phone to look after eating to check your teeth?

The point is, we look in the mirror NUMEROUS times throughout the day, even if you are not particularly narcissistic.  You spend a lot of time in it the morning, and probably quite a bit before going to bed at night.  Throughout the day you are continuously interacting with the mirror.  What if our relationship with God was the same?  What if we interacted with God and “checked in” with him all throughout the day instead of compartmentalizing him into one part of the day?

How about this–what if we relied on God like we do mirrors?  When you look in the mirror, do you ever doubt what you see?  What if you thought about God like this?  And when you look to God to give you truth about who you are, whether it’s to affirm your identity or reveal blemishes, how do you react?  Do you believe him and do something about it, or act like the mirror is a funhouse mirror?

I pray that I might spend as much time with God at least as much I do in front of the mirror, and certainly as often.  I pray that I might rely on God like I do mirrors to reflect my divine image and to reveal my blemishes and the areas I’m screwing up in.

Jonah the Crybaby

bible, god

Well, I told myself I wasn’t going to post another blog until after I got back from Kentucky. But then I remembered a few things:

  1. When I get back from Kentucky, I’m going to want to post about Kentucky.
  2. I should talk about this while it’s fresh on my mind.
  3. I don’t feel like going to bed yet, even though I leave in 4 hours for a 9-hour drive to Kentucky.

So, onto Jonah.  I studied Jonah last week for my Sunday School lesson with the high schoolers.  We’ve been going through the minor prophets, which I have honestly loved.  It’s been very refreshing to read the MPs in a new way, because I’m trying hard to understand what’s going on in order to teach it.

Anywho, so Jonah one day was eating his cereal, when God tells him, “Go to Nineveh and preach destruction to them.”  Jonah drops his spoon and is all like, “Forget THAT!” and flees towards Tarshish.  He pays a fare and boards a boat.  So then a huge storm comes, and the sailors are automatically like, “Okay, whose god is ticked off?”  They then realize that Jonah is downstairs sleeping, still running away from his problems, and ignoring a huge storm outside the boat. The sailors realize that Jonah is running away from his god, the God.  Jonah’s just like, “Look, just throw me over.”  (This might seem brave to the reader, like he’s coming to the realization that he can’t run away from God anymore; but I think it’s just a part of his crybaby act).  I don’t understand why, but the sailors think it’s a good idea to just try to row back to land, but they realize that they have to do it–so they throw Jonah overboard.  Then a huge fish gulps Jonah right up, and Jonah begins crying and praying to God.  He repents, and God tells the fish to spit him up (after three days and three nights of course!).  So now Jonah finally goes to Nineveh, and preaches what God tells him.  And what do you know?  The whole city repents.  You’d think Jonah would be excited, right?  His preaching and prophesying worked!  Nope!  He gets mad and yells at God, “I knew it! I knew you would just have compassion on them!  That’s the kind of God you are!”  Kind of a funny prayer to me.  So he runs away and sits outside the city, waiting to see what will happen, as if God will change his mind about having compassion.  He takes shade under a tree, but God sends a worm to eat its leaves and Jonah starts feeling that sun.  He gets so angry that he wants to DIE.  He cries again to God, and God says, “You care for that tree right?”  Jonah replies, “So much, that without it I just want to die!”  God responds, “Well you sure care for that plant a lot.  But how much more do I care for a great city like Nineveh, with tons of animals and needy people?”

So what do we take from Jonah the big crybaby, anyway?

  1.  We can NOT run away from God.  No matter how hard we try. We can’t do it.  And if we try, God will find us! Oh yeah.  In all seriousness, if it is God’s will and God commands us to do something, we are eventually going to have to do it.  So save the trouble and the energy and just go do what he tells you to do.  Trust me; when God called me to work with youth, I ran away and got myself into a pickle myself.  And God got his way in the end :)
  2. God is going to have compassion on all sorts of sinners.  I thought about the parable of the vineyard, how each person was paid the same amount for varying amounts of work.  Seems unfair, right?  But we need to remember that no matter what you did, how much sin you committed, etc, the reward is the same under the grace of God.  God will have compassion for you when you repent, no matter what the sin is.  This is hard for me sometimes, when I think about someone like a child molester possibly getting into heaven.  I would classify this man as a pedophile or sex offender for the rest of his life; but the truth is that if he comes to Christ, he is redeemed and achieves sainthood just like me.  I can honestly see why Jonah was so cheesed.  It’s the flesh in me that wants justice in this situation, but luckily I am not the judge.
  3. God cares for us DEEPLY.  Jonah wanted to die, just because the plant giving him shade died.  In the same way, God desires to see us growing and cares for us immensely.  I think it’s funny that Jonah was like, “I knew it! I knew you’d have compassion on them! Oh God full of grace and compassion!”  It makes me laugh!  I think that it is our responsibility, as believers and followers, to exhibit this same kind of love to others.  Jonah cared for a PLANT.  What would happen if he cried over people the same way as he did a plant?

Well, I hope you enjoyed my post on Jonah, a huge cry-baby.  But you know what?  I’m just like him in many ways.

ps, I really like that Jonah is so fast-paced.  Very different from the other prophets so far ;)

Give Me Your Eyes

christianity, music, sin

Sometimes I hate that I’m so transparent with my readers, because a post like I’m about to write is one of those where I’m DYING to share with people, but at the same time am afraid that people will just laugh at me.  I don’t mind the laughs (I laugh at myself all the time), yet I hope that some conversation and contemplation will spark.

This last week, I have been overly emotional.  I know this is due to a LOT of things, including spending time with my family last week, reading a book recreationally for the first time in a LONG time, just being a woman with hormones, and my cat dying last night.

Every time I see someone hurting, even when it’s supposed to be “funny”, I hurt inside.  I turned on Maury the other day, which I haven’t seen since middle school.  It was showing the top 10 guests of 2010, and every single story broke my heart.  Baby daddy drama, people cheating on each other, best friends stabbing each other in the back; I couldn’t take it all!  So I started bawling like a baby!  Friends would talk to me about the hurts they were going through, and the tears just started jerking!  I couldn’t watch the ASPCA commercials with all the animals needing to be adopted, because it hurt me to see them hurting.

Now, I’m not having an emotional breakdown (yet).  I think that it’s due to my increasing sensitivity of pop culture and how it glamorizes sin and hurt.  I don’t find a lot of things funny anymore.  I really don’t enjoy movies that curse every few seconds.  It hurts me when I see children cursing on television or Youtube, and parents think it’s funny.  I just find a lot of things unnatractive.

My challenge to you is to think about things that you have been desensitized to, and really just cry out to God to make those known to you.  Pray that you can have a heart for the things God has a heart for.  I hope that this week of increased emotions lasts and stays with me, even if that means that I do a whole lot more crying (FYI, I’m not much of a crier).

Here is one of my favorite songs, just for good measure ;)

Great is Thy Faithfulness

faithfulness, god, testimony

I had a rough day, so I need to remind myself of all of the things that God has specifically done for me as an individual to exhibit his Great Faithfulness.

God showed his grace to my sister, and she is now a passionate follower…and sometimes gives me great wisdom :)

When I prayed for an internship, he gave me one that rocked my world, changed my life, and affirmed my passion in ministry.

When I prayed for Christian fellowship while home in STL, it was granted in ways I never expected. I found new friendships and strengthened old ones.

I asked for more Christian brothers. And I now have a plethora, and that list grows seriously daily.

I begged God to send me Christian women. Through my internship, I met some wonderful women who constantly bless my life.

God sent a few people recently who revealed that I had blessed their Christian walks when I was young. Like, real young. One remembered my name from meeting me when I was 12 and contacted me.  Another was a Sunday School teacher.  God showed me how I have developed since. Amazing :)

God granted my prayer and has sent me some truth-tellers who tell me like it is. I can now reform.

God always provided when my parents couldn’t.

After my internship, I asked, “Now what?”  And God showed me what I desired most, and then gave it to me. I am a youth minister now. Still weird to say out loud.

When I was mad at God for not letting me be an RA this year, he showed me that’s not what I really wanted. I desired true discipleship, and there were much greater ways for me to do that.  Then he gave me this amazing discipleship group that I get to hang out with. And they like listening to me talk. whoa, God is crazy good :)

God gave me the most amazing rainbow of my life in the middle of a time where I was distressed.

For years and years and years I begged God to help me get rid of my depression.  I read a chapter of a book (and i don’t EVER read, unfortunately) and almost overnight I was better.

Every time I’ve ever prayed for a job, I’ve gotten one.

I’ve prayed away heartaches, headaches, hunger, and lack of heat. God always provides.

I get comments on my blogs sometimes. Always a prayer answered, that maybe something I have said resonates with someone besides myself :)

Confrontation

bible, christianity

Confrontation. A dreaded word for most. It’s uncomfortable, it’s awkward, and most think it’s unneeded. Our culture makes it seem that if someone approaches you and expresses discontent with you, that makes them a “b-word” or rude. People get easily offended, and often lash out on the person who is “offending” them. So what do people do instead of confront problems with another? They talk about the person behind their back. They bottle up all of their anger. They physically harm the person, or get revenge in a social way. Ellie Wiesel, a famous Holocaust survivor, once said, “Violence is a language. When language fails, violence becomes the language.” This means that when people can’t find the words to express emotions, they turn to something else. So instead of confronting each other, we harm each other, whether it is emotionally, physically, or socially.

Is this healthy? No! Psychologists are constantly saying that we need to confront our issues and talk them out. In family/marital/premarital counseling, the hardest part is getting the people fighting to communicate their emotions and discontent in things that the other person is doing. People just don’t understand how to communicate anymore, and maybe that’s becuase of technologies like texting and social networking that make communication “easier” and less confrontational. One of my favorite quotes is, “The more means of communication we have, the less we communicate (what we mean).” It’s so much easier to confront someone on Facebook than to go to them in real life and express an issue in words.

What does the Bible say?

Before you come to God, make sure you are right with others.
· Leave your gift there before the altar and go. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift. Matthew 5:24

Do not sin out of anger…pray about it. 

· Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger…Ephesians 4:26

Ask, what have I done in this situation? Have I sinned?  What is the problem here?
· What causes quarrels and what causes fights among you? Is it not this,that your passions are at war within you? James 4:1-6
· You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye. Matthew 7:5

Confront in a calm and respectful tone…don’t get too emotional!
· A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. Proverbs 15:1
· “If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother. Matthew 18:15
· Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ, from whom the whole body, joined and held together by every joint with which it is equipped, when each part is working properly, makes the body grow so that it builds itself up in love. Ephesians 4:15-16 ESV

Forgive! You have been forgiven for much worse.
· Bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. Colossians 3:13
· Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working. James 5:16
· Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. Ephesians 4:31-32

If they don’t react well, then move on. Treat them like a brother.  
· “if your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink; for by so doing you will heap burning coals on his head.” Romans 12:20

· “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God. Matthew 5:9 


If it’s serious, get others involved.·
But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, that every charge may be established by the evidence of two or three witnesses. If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church. And if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector. Matthew 18:16-17

I used to react terribly towards problems and confrontation.  I grew up in an environment where if you had beef with someone, you fought them.  But that is not correct.  Some people gossip about the person behind their back. Again, not right.  The Biblical method is talking with a person about your discontent and maturely resolving the issue together.  This is hard, I know!  Many people are not raised to do this!  I encourage everyone reading this to grow and learn how to approach problems in a healthy, Biblical way.  And remember, if someone is confronting you with an issue, they don’t hate you! They desire to mend the relationship with you.  And if you desire to mend the relationship with your brothers and sisters, you had better learn how to maturely and effectively confront.

Faith ♥

christianity, faith
Now for one of my absolute faaaaaaaavorite topics, faith.
((Lately in church, the pastor has been preaching out of James on the passage about Faith and Works.  This happens to be one of my most absolute favorite verses.  My friend Brandi also talked about this idea a bit in chapel last week, and I had a fabulous conversation with her before she spoke and amazing conversations with people following her “sermon.”  This summer, I faced the difficulty in teaching the idea of faith and works, because it’s a hard thing to teach without sounding legalistic.  So I feel like it’s about time for me to write about it!))
So I’ll begin :)

Faith without works is dead.  What does that mean?  It means that you cannot have a true, saving faith without repercussions afterwards.  Salvation is more than just praying a prayer; it has to have after-effects.  Think about a marriage—they make a promise, sign a piece of paper, and go on with their life living the same way, right?  NO!  Every day when they wake up, they renew their commitment and strive to please their spouse.  A relationship with Christ is the same way.  You make a commitment to a relationship with Him, and this love for Him should radically change your life daily.  I believe very deeply that it is impossible to get into heaven without a transformation in your life, even if you “pray the prayer” and “ask Jesus into your life.”

Am I being harsh?  Some might think so.  Let’s examine the word “faith”, though!  The word faith in Greek is pistis.  The word in itself means “an active, working faith.”  It is used hundreds of time in the Bible, and if you took a look to examine each of these times, usually you will see that in the context of the passage around it there are actions supplementing the faith.  I think that some people mistake “faith” and “believing.”  James says, “Even the demons believe, and they shudder.”  Does believing in God get you to heaven?  No.  Faith does.  What’s the difference between faith and believing?  The action put into faith.  Faith then, by its definition here, “is an active belief.”  If you take away the actions or works from faith, all you get is “belief”, and belief gets you nowhere in eternity.  When looking at the two words behind “faith” and believe” in Greek, the difference is the conviction behind “faith”, and the actions put into it and not into “believe”.  Faith without works is dead, not only in the fact that it is no longer death, but it doesn’t bring you Eternal Life.
In our modern Christian attempt to draw more people to Christ and show that Christianity is not about legalism, I think that we have produced an apathetic Christianity.  Christians are too comfortable in their lives and aren’t doing anything about their beliefs.  (Listen to Lecrae’s “Send Me!”) I think this is incredibly sad!  When Jesus called his disciples, what did He say?  GET UP and FOLLOW ME.  He didn’t say, “Just, um, believe that I exist and we’re good!”  They believed in Him, but by their actions they gained true faith.
Let me be clear here, you do not obtain salvation through actions.  You obtain salvation through faith.  Faith is an active, working belief, meaning you believe in it and thus are driven to do something about it.  Example:  I believe that my bed does not have snakes in it.  To have faith in it would mean that I would actually get in the bed.  We believe in God, but to have faith in Him would be to follow his commands and to live out his promises.

So how do we have an active, working belief—Faith?  First of all, following His commands.  We are commanded to Love God with everything we got, and to love our neighbors as ourselves.  This is the summary, to me, of living out faith.  James talks about how true religion is helping out the orphans and widows, and if we see anybody in need to help them in a physical and tangible way.  I think tithing is a good way to act out your faith in God and His church; it shows that you trust in the church the same way I trust in my snakeless bed.  Evangelizing, spreading the Gospel, is an amazing way of spreading your faith by living out God’s commands of making disciples.  Discipling a younger believer, getting involved in choir, attending a camp or retreat; these are all good ways of acting out faith.  Making war with sin and trying to overcome temptation is necessary.  The great thing about living out faith is that there is not “cookie-cutter” way of doing it, which eliminates legalism.  Each person has their own special gift; make sure to use it when you live out your faith.

The bottom line is, if you believe in Jesus Christ and call Him your Lord and Savior, that HAS to have an effect on your life…it has HAD to have moved you!

I hope I have done this topic justice.  Please read James 2, Hebrews 11, and Romans.  And then go do something about what you believe in.

Glad I didn’t miss chapel…

college, god, identity, love

Today God really reminded me of how much he loves me.  His love for me is extravagant and just more that I can ever imagine.  His love is more intimate than any other friend’s love for me.  I don’t even choose to be loved by Him, He loves me no matter what.  His love is amazing, and stronger than any other love I have ever known.  It’s overwhelming and enticing.  It’s irresistible.  It’s grace-filled.  It’s mighty.  It covers all of my sin and is greater than all the “good” things I have done put altogether.  It’s not contingent on what others think of me.  It is not dependent on any other factor than God’s mercy.  It’s just…God.  God IS love.

Murmur Murmur Murmur, Why Am I This Way? MAKE. WAR!

christianity, music, sin

Do you glorify your sin? Are you tripping STILL off of who you once was? Are you putting up barriers because you can’t get past it?

I was. I am. And I am sure that you are too.
This was revealed to me this summer. As many know, I was an intern this summer at an amazing church in Illinois. I learned so much about ministry and about myself. One of my breaking moments was when it was revealed to me that I am so caught up in who I was, that I can’t be who I am now or continue onto who I need to be in Christ.
I see this happen a lot in myself and my friends. I have friends who STILL think that they have a sin that no one else can relate to. There are girls who weren’t exactly pure in high school, and now think that they don’t deserve a good Godly man who, in their eyes, got all their cookies together. There are people who were in gangs and now feel like no one can relate to them, so they fade into the background so that no one will notice them. There are many who feel like their family life is so messy, they refuse to talk about family with people. But the truth is, we have ALL had sin and we have ALL had trials. We put up barriers so people can’t get in. Even I have been guitly of this, I who thought my life was an open book! I never would have thought that I did this! I BLOG MY LIFE for goodness sakes!
If we aren’t putting barriers up because of our sin, we are glorifying it. Oh yes. A friend of mine told me that in his first conversation with a boy he was to mentor, the boy told my friend of all the things he had done: sex, weed, alcohol, gangs, etc. He said it without my friend even asking, and afterwards seemed pleased with himself. My friend just looked at him and asked, “Are you proud of that? Are you happy you did all that? Because you sure act like it!” Sometimes, we think that our testimony is so legit and amazing, that we almost take pride in the sin that he had committed. I am guilty, again. I know many Christians that sit around and talk about what their favorite alcoholic drink was “back in the day” (ha, two years ago?!) and laugh about the times they got flat our drunk and did some stupid thing. Why is this funny? And how can you laugh about it one minute, then try to minister with it the next?
Oh man, this reminds me of a story. A few years ago on a mission trip, I was talking with the girls I was mentoring about their testimonies. I was trying to help them work through them so they could use them to minister to those on the mission trip. One girl told me of how she cheated on her boyfriend, had sex with his friend, and contracted chlamydia. Just like that. I said, “And…?” She replied, “That’s it.” I asked, “And how are you going to use this as a testimony?” She shrugged. She didn’t know. I asked her, “Where was God in all this?” She said, “He helped me through it.” Although true, I was looking for more: “Did you learn anything?” “Yeah, he’ll help me when I need him.” That was not what I’m looking for. How about learning that sin has consequences? Or knowing that God was faithful to you even when you sinned, so you should revamp your life and repent so that you aren’t committing that same sin! I suggested these things, and it discouraged her. She wasn’t ready for a change, just corporate confession to make her feel better.
Okay, scripture time. This was one of the verses this summer that really spoke and got me to really think about what I was doing to myself. Philippians 2: 1-14:

1 Further, my brothers and sisters, rejoice in the Lord! It is no trouble for me to write the same things to you again, and it is a safeguard for you. 2 Watch out for those dogs, those evildoers, those mutilators of the flesh. 3 For it is we who are the circumcision, we who serve God by his Spirit, who boast in Christ Jesus, and who put no confidence in the flesh— 4 though I myself have reasons for such confidence.
If someone else thinks they have reasons to put confidence in the flesh, I have more: 5 circumcised on the eighth day, of the people of Israel, of the tribe of Benjamin, a Hebrew of Hebrews; in regard to the law, a Pharisee; 6 as for zeal, persecuting the church; as for righteousness based on the law, faultless.
7 But whatever were gains to me I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. 8 What is more, I consider everything a loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them garbage, that I may gain Christ 9 and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ—the righteousness that comes from God on the basis of faith. 10 I want to know Christ—yes, to know the power of his resurrection and participation in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, 11and so, somehow, attaining to the resurrection from the dead.
12 Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. 13 Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, 14 I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.

Paul really was a terrible sinner. He had plenty to boast about, too! He was pretty much the best Jew, a “righteous” Pharisee, etc. He made it in the world. He even persecuted Christians. But he counted it all as loss. It wasn’t this mighty thing that he could now tell everyone he met. It was something that he could use to minister when needed. Our testimony isn’t what compels people to Christ. It’s the grace that does, as revealed through Scripture and through our testimonies. My testimony is powerful, I need to understand that. However, I need to focus not on all the bad things I did, but how powerful His grace was to me, that even while I was still a dirty rotten sinner, He died for me and I no longer need to even think about who I was. It is all behind me, and the Cross and my eternal life is ahead of me.
I know this is a long post, but here is something you should watch! It’s a song called “Make War” by Tedashii. It talks about how as Christians, we talk about our sin and glorify it SO much! But instead of glorifying it, we need to be making war with it!