Ministry

I’m down with Rebecca Black!

music, youth ministry

Every time I have logged onto Twitter in the last week, I have seen one name: Rebecca Black.  The other night, a friend of mine showed me Rebecca’s music video, “Friday”, that went viral.  The lyrics are less than genius, the singing is completely auto-tuned, and the video itself is…well… hilariously bad.

The reason she has gotten so popular is because the song has been dubbed “the worst song of all time.”  And although that might be true in some ways, I’ve decided I love it and love her.
First of all, the responses have been absolutely terrible.  People are telling her to “go cut herself and die”, they are tweeting her that they are going to “come to her house with an ak47”, and more.  People are being downright rude and mean to her.  It’s terrible.  What happened to the recent campaigns of trying to prevent bullying?  We laugh at their comments, contribute, but what is it doing?  Making a thirteen year old cry.
And that’s a huge thing–she is THIRTEEN.  Her song isn’t about getting high, having sex, or adult love (which she had the option of doing a song like that, but she refused for something more “age-appropriate”).  Her song is completely appropriate for being thirteen.  Is it a funny song?  Yes.  Does she know the lyrics are dumb?  Duh.  But she’s thirteen, people.  I love me some Justin Bieber, but what does a 17-year old know about his “one love?”  She’s singing age-appropriate songs.
I laughed and laughed when I heard this song…and I still laugh.  But then God reminded me–what if she was in my youth group?  This girl is hurting.

And getting famous because of it.

So gon’ head Rebecca Black! Do yo thang! And don’t let people stop you!

And from now on, every Friday, I’m gonna be sing your song! Because then tomorrow’s Saturday, and I always forget what comes afterwards, but then you reassure me it’s Sunday ;)

Putting myself in the shoes of my students…

youth ministry

Someone posted this picture on facebook today. Can you tell which one is me?  haha.
(If you really can’t guess, I am the white girl. The only one.  More specifically, the one in the left-hand corner of that center pic.)

This picture is from the 6th grade, back in 2001! Wow!  That feels like soooo long ago, yet it was only a decade ago.  I hear that’s a short amount of time in the grand scheme of things.

I can’t stop looking at this picture.  To me, this pic speaks volumes to me, as I begin remembering each individual in that class, remember how difficult that year was for me, and remember how stinking awkward I was.  I was a 6th grade girl, unique from the rest of my class in many ways.  It sincerely brings tears to my eyes thinking about that difficult time in my life.

I keep asking myself, “Is how I felt then how many of my youth feel now?”  It puts things into great perspective for me.  Do they feel different from the rest of people in school?  Are they dealing with two-faced backstabbers?  Are they dealing with gender roles?  Identity issues?  Sexuality?  You bet.  Race/ethnicity issues?  More so than not.  As hard as it was for me a decade ago, it’s harder now for this group of middle schoolers.  The times are a-changing.

I posted this really to inspire.  I don’t have any advice really.  All I can say is this:  When your teenager (whether it is in your youth group, or your child, or your sibling) comes to you with problems, are you putting yourself in their shoes?  Look back and remember how difficult things were for you.  Then remind yourself of how more difficult everything is now.  And then have compassion.

Here are some more pics of me from middle school:

this was one of my best school pics, ever (6th grade)


My second trip to summer camp. I was 14.

this was when my friends and I thought it was cool to wear long dangly elegant earrings with t-shirts. or, one long earring and one stud.

this lady has been my best friend for the last ten years :)

I’m the white girl in the back. I used to hide in the back of photos.  this was my youth group 8th grade year (going into high school)! I wore these dorky fake glasses, because that was my style.

This is from my freshman year of high school, but it’s so dorky and I don’t even know what I was thinking with that dress. haha.

Spiritual Gifts in Youth Ministry

lessons, spiritual gifts, youth ministry

As a youth minister beginning a ministry basically from scratch in the church I began serving in five months ago, I knew that I needed to create a mission statement.  Not just to be all Baptist and cool like that, but I knew I needed something to focus on–something as a template and frame for the ministry.  I came up with, “Grace Fellowship Baptist Church Youth Group exists to unite teenagers together in the Bolivar community to teach them Biblical Truths, disciple them into mature believers, and equip them to express their faith through the use of spiritual gifts to reach the lost world.”

So far, I had been teaching them Biblical Truths. I believe (and hope) that I had been discipling them into mature believers.  But that last part?  Equip them to express their faith through the use of spiritual gifts? Whoa. Spiritual gifts?  Yep, that hadn’t been done for the first few months of ministry (unless you count our epic Christmas skit).

So I knew I had to start somewhere. The first night, we looked at scriptures from Ephesians, Corinthians, and other passages and came up with a list of gifts. I gave them an inventory (you can find one like it here) to begin with.  Although I know these tests aren’t completely reliable, it helps us think about what our gifts could be.  I have a notebook from when I was 13 and first took a test; and the gifts that I scored “high” in then, I score high in now and actually consider them my gifts.  I had completely forgot that I even took one then, so it’s kind of cool to see that the test was “right.”

The next week we talked about the inventory, and laid out the “biblical foundation” for spiritual gifts.  I gave them the following list of spiritual truths:
1. Every Christian has at least one Spiritual Gift (1 Peter 4:10)
2. No Christian has all the gifts (1 Corinthians 12:28-30)
3. We cannot choose our gifts; God does that job (1 Corinthians 12:7-11)
4. There is no gift that every Christian possesses (1 Corinthians 12:29-30)
5. Believers will account to the Lord for how they use their gifts (1 Peter 4:10)
6. Spiritual Gifts indicate God’s call and purpose for a Christian’s life (Romans 12:2-8)
7. Gifts used without love do not accomplish God’s intended purposes (1 Corinthians 13:1-3)
8. Spiritual Gifts are for the common good to build up the Body (1 Corinthians 12:27)
9. We must use our gifts. (2 Timothy 3:16; Romans 12; 1 Corinthians 12-14; Ephesians 4; 1 Peter 4)
10. There is affirmation and positive feedback within the Body of Christ for the expression of the gift (1 Corinthians 12:7; Ephesians 4:16)
11. There is agreement within the Body of Christ that the Holy Spirit is at work (1 John 4:1; 1 Thessalonians 5:21)
12. The Holy Spirit provides peace in our spirits as we offer our gifts to the Body of Christ (John 15:26; Romans 8:16)
13. There is evidence of godly fruit in the life of the Body (John 15:8; Matthew 7:16-20)
14. Believers offer their gifts for the common good as others have need (Acts 2:44-45; 1 Corinthians 12:7)
15. Unless gifts are offered in love, they have no worth (1 Corinthians 13:1-3)
16. We should strive to live a life worthy of our calling (Ephesians 4:1)

(I understand that some of those are redundant, but hey.)
When we were discussing that, I came up with a diagram. I’m big into diagrams, and I made this one up on the spot (and have tweaked it every week since). I’m actually quite proud of it (not in a prideful kind of way, haha).

It might seem confusing to you, but it is based off of all the verses in the “biblical foundation” I expressed before.
That took a night or two to go through, because I wanted them to really get into what the bible says and read almost all of the verses.

After that, we went through the gifts in depth.  (You can download the workbook I gave them here…I used “Baptist-friendly” gifts, haha).  We have spent a few Sundays going through it.  We aren’t reading all the scriptures associated, because they already understand that the gift exists through earlier scriptures.  We have spent more than a month of Sunday nights doing this.  I’ve been doing it with the Sunday night crowd for one main reason–the people who are most devoted to the church and to growing spiritually tend to come then.  On Wednesday nights, you never know who is going to come, so it’s easier to do it with the “regulars”.

This won’t be the first time we go through this sort of study.  The hardest thing is trying to get them to think of ways to use their gifts now.  It’s hard when you say, “I have the gift of administration, what can I do with that as a 14-year old?”  Part of my job is to help them come up with ways. Rethinking Youth Ministry posted a blog earlier today about how one youth pastor is trying to do it. I want them to get involved in any facet possible–music, ushering, recreation, leading studies/devotions, tech, prayer, etc.

What ideas do you guys have to help me out?  How do you discuss spiritual gifts with your youth group?  As a young minister, I would like help from those who have been through this before.

Barriers in Youth Ministry…that YOU put up!!!

youth ministry

Update: This post was nominated for YouthMin.Org’s “Top Youth Ministry Blog Post of 2011.” Unfortunately, I didn’t even find out about the contest until February, and didn’t have time to “campaign.” Ha! But apparently some people were blessed by it, and voted for it. Thanks!

 

When we think of barriers in youth ministry, we automatically think of…what? Time? Money? Parents? ;)

But have you ever thought of how YOU are contributing to these barriers? And what barriers are you setting up yourself?

Age

So you’re a few decades older than the students. Or maybe you’re only a few years older than the students. Age is nothing but a number, right? Age indeed puts up a barrier, but perhaps we make a bigger deal out of it than it really is. I know, as a very young minister myself, that I often struggle with, “How am I going to be a cool mentor and an authoritative adult at the same time?” One of my biggest pet peeves is ministers or adults who call teenagers “kids”. Teenagers don’t need another person calling them a kid. They want to be seen as adults, want to be seen as more mature, and “kids” degrades them. It also sets up the barrier of “I’m soooo much more older than you.” Another way you can set this barrier is talking about events in your life as if they were SUPER long ago. Maybe they were, maybe they weren’t. But if you talk about events as if you are 137 years old, you are probably going to lose your rapport with the teen.

Sin

This seems pretty obvious. Yet I’m not necessarily talking about the sin you currently struggle with; I’m talking about the sinful life you once lead. Sometimes we glorify our sin so much, that people can’t relate to us. It’s good to talk about how you were completely different before we met Christ. Yet sometimes in the midst we separate ourselves from our audience in the process. And not just our sin, but our whole testimony. I’ll give an example: Last summer I worked at a church in the suburbs. Most of the teens I worked with had nice houses, nice cars when they turned 16, had Christian families, and lived pretty nice lives (on the outside, of course. they still had problems). So I came in, and from the bat presented my testimony–this girl from the hood, grew up very poor, committed every sin possible. Was that wrong? No. Yet I dwelled on my past, I brought it up a lot, and created a gap between my girls and I. I made myself un-relateable. I have fought hard and God has done a great work in me, so that I don’t HAVE to think about who I once was anymore. This race is about pressing forward, not running backwards. I have seen a lot of other leaders at conferences and such make this same mistake.

Time

If we have a second job, or also are going to school, or have a family, sometimes we make it seem like we are completely busy all the time. Even if we are, if we convey that the wrong way to teens, they might think that we are too busy to help them. They might think that they are not worth our time, so if they really do have a big problem they need help with, they might hesitate to come to us. After all, we are really busy, right? So there is this barrier of “I have too much to do” that turns into teens finishing off your statement with “to help me”.

What are some other barriers that you put up unintentionally? I”m guilty of all three of these (not that I’m trying to glorify it!)

My Visit to Seminary

Blogs about Heather, college, youth ministry

I had the opportunity this week to visit a seminary.  To be honest, I wasn’t sure what to think.  Going into college, I was just excited about getting an undergrad degree.  As college progressed, I began to think more and more about seminary.  Seminary is basically grad school that is only focused on theological degrees.

The same concerns that I had before visiting seminary are the same concerns I have now.  Which is discouraging, but at the same time all my questions were answered and now I have a lot to think about.

Here are some of the things I’m thinking about.

  1. Seminary seems like an extension of my undergraduate degree in ministry.  Most of the people who attend seminary have their undergraduate in something completely unrelated to ministry or theology.  Most of the classes they are taking I have already taken.  Granted, they are at a much higher level of difficulty, but they are similar.  A lot of churches require for youth ministers to have a seminary degree, but I wonder if, because my undergrad is essentially the same thing, if it really matters.
  2. If in fact it does matter, do I want to be in a church that requires seminary?  I know that it’s extremely important to have training in theology and such; that is why my undergrad is in ministry. Duhhh.  But I don’t know if I desire to work in a fancy-pants church.  I honestly would rather just go to the inner-city and live among the desperate and give them the raw gospel.  You don’t need seminary to do that.  Heck, you don’t need college to do that.  Yet I am in college trying to make myself smarter.  I’m afraid that if I get any smarter, I’ll become super-arrogant.  I’ve exhibited the signs.  There may be no turning back.
  3. Also, what is more important, education or experience?  I’m completing an undergrad in ministry, a program similar to many seminaries.  I am also already a youth minister while in college.  Who will someone hire, a person who graduated from seminary, or a person who has already served as the head honcho of a youth group for a few years?  I’m just saying.
  4. Am I going to be able to use the extra theology in ministry?  Again this comes back to arrogance.  I don’t want to make myself so smart, that I’m not able to relate to teenagers anymore (especially inner-city teens).  There was one guy that I talked to this week, and he has a similar path that I’m taking-undergrad in youthmin, youthminister at a church, attending seminary.  When I asked if he’s applying seminary, he didn’t convince me with his answer.  He then revealed he’s thinking about becoming a head pastor one day, and then it was clear to me that his seminary classes were more for that.
  5. I’m a girl. *shock*  From what I hear, the girls on a seminary campus are one of two breeds: super-shy awkward girl or super-crazy liberal feminist.  I’m neither.  My theology is surprisingly to some not feminist (even though I’m a female in ministry) and I’m not shy and not awkward by accident.  I also heard that females on campus are like cars-taken or broken. Soooo basically…… well I don’t have to say how that makes me feel (pretty self-explanatory).

Readers, don’t think that I’m saying seminary isn’t important.  I’m just orating the thoughts sprouting into my head so that I can iron them out.  Any feedback would be nice :)

Oh, also, if you are a youth minister who went to a seminary, you mind giving me your outlook?

A Woman Youth Minister

women, youth ministry

I think this post has been processing in my brain for the last three years, and was just waiting to bust out.  What is it like to be a woman youth minister?

Well, let me tell you :)

Although I’ve only been the head of a youth group for four months now, I can definitely see the advantages and disadvantages of being a woman in a leading role of the church.  I am very lucky to have a church that completely supports me as a woman in ministry, and also realizes that for the type of youth group they have, a woman leader seems to fit really well.

What are the advantages I have on men?  Well, we’re gonna get pretty cliche and stereotypical here.  Women are more emotional, and men are more physical.  Thus, women are more relational and want to dig into students’ lives more emotionally.  Women can sense when people are hurting almost instantly.  Men are more physical and active, so they are more able to relate using sports and other physical activities.  Once again, these are stereotypes, but most will find this to be true.  I certainly think this is true for me, and that is why my ministry is so relational and discipleship-centered instead of physical team-building and recreational-centered.  I found that where I have voids, I am extremely lucky to have men volunteering to fill them.  I also feel that as a leader I am more organized than most men, and I also feel like I build relationships with the parents easier than I see some guys.  I am not saying that it is better to have a woman minister, by any means.  I can get emotional, I let little things bother me at times, and I have a hard time relating to sports (which is big for most teenage boys).

I think that the differences between men and women prove to me that it takes a man and a woman to run youth ministry.  I also think it can be harder for a woman to gain respect in ministry, especially (and ironically) from her peer youth ministers.  It seems to be that the most flack I get for being a woman in ministry isn’t from parents, my pastor, or youth; but from males who are in ministry.  I hope to prove to my peers my passion for ministry and gain their respect.

The Purpose

youth ministry

I just wanted to reiterate the purpose of this blog.  The other day at lunch  one of my friends asked what a blog was.  Well, it’s anything you want it to be.  Some people use it to help get business for a company, so use it to rant about people they don’t like, some use it to connect to others about sports or cooking, etc.

So why do *I* blog?  I blog lessons that I am learning.  I blog because I want people to know what’s going on in my life.  I blog because I have to sort out all the things that I am learning, and share them with people.  I blog because I like to talk.  I blog because I like to teach.  I blog because I feel like God wants me to share particular things with people.  I blog to get things off my chest.  I blog because I am vulnerable.  I blog because I want people to share in my imperfections.  I blog because I love to.

I’ve been contemplating one thing in particular that has taken over my thoughts the last month…Since I am a legit youth minister now (still weird to say), I have been thinking about the example I want my youth to follow.  When I listen to music, or watch a television show, or speak, I think to myself, “Is this the way I want my youth to behave?”  If not, then I reform it.  It’s quite interesting to me, and I’m realizing that I still don’t have all my cookies in the jar (I think I just made that analogy up).  I’ve been thinking about the people I hang out with, and all sorts of stuff.  I think I’m going to start a fast from secular music soon, just to see the way it impacts me (not because I think it’s sinful…and this is kind of an aside).

I don’t think that I am a terrible person by the world’s standards, and I think that God would even say that I’m a young woman after His heart.  However, there is still sin in my life, and although there always will be, I don’t want to cause anybody else to stumble…ESPECIALLY my youth.  They are the most important people in my life, and my God-given purpose is to train them up in righteousness.  So there are things in my life that I’m going to have to get rid of in order to train them up.  This is going to be hard for me because I’m realizing that I’m still very much impacted by the “secular world.”

Besides my youth, I know a LOT of people who don’t know Christ… a LOT.  And I know a lot of people who have been trapped by legalism, telling them that they have to do certain things in order to be a Christian, and live the most perfect life or they’re not “Christlike”.  If you believe this, please go read Romans.  We are freed from the grips of sin and the grips of legalism.  However, if we want to lead people to Christ, we should probably try our hardest to live like Him, or our testimony could wither and our ministry hindered.  So even things that I don’t see as a “big deal”, I want to try to correct in my life, because someone else probably does see them as a big deal.  And if I want to reach them, maybe I should get rid of this.

I ask that anybody who is reading this pray for me.  I really want to impact the next generation, that is my specific calling.  So I’m going to really have to reform some things in my life.

This whole thing makes me think of 2 passages:

“Not many of you should become teachers, my fellow believers, because you know that we who teach will be judged more strictly. We all stumble in many ways. Anyone who is never at fault in what they say is perfect, able to keep their whole body in check.” James 3:1

“But not everyone possesses this knowledge. Some people are still so accustomed to idols that when they eat sacrificial food they think of it as having been sacrificed to a god, and since their conscience is weak, it is defiled. But food does not bring us near to God; we are no worse if we do not eat, and no better if we do.

 Be careful, however, that the exercise of your rights does not become a stumbling block to the weak. 1For if someone with a weak conscience sees you, with all your knowledge, eating in an idol’s temple, won’t that person be emboldened to eat what is sacrificed to idols?  So this weak brother or sister, for whom Christ died, is destroyed by your knowledge. When you sin against them in this way and wound their weak conscience, you sin against Christ. Therefore, if what I eat causes my brother or sister to fall into sin, I will never eat meat again, so that I will not cause them to fall.”  1 Corinthians 8:7-13

Sorry for the randomness, guys.  This is my heart today.

This is Weird.

college, youth ministry

So this is weird.  I’m thinking about how we are all going to grow up one day.  I feel like just yesterday I was in high school, not understanding who I am and struggling to fit in.  And here I am, in college, with a slightly better understanding of who I am and people who are constantly affirming that.  It’s crazy.  And tomorrow, I’m going to be an adult.  Well not really tomorrow, but when I get to that point, I am going to wonder where the time went.  I wonder what it’s going to be like when we are 80 years old. Weird. So. Stinking. Weird.

As I looked online for curriculum, and pa-rouse youth ministry sites, I realized something.  One day, my colleagues are going to be the people writing this curriculum and making these sites.  My friends are going to be the ones speaking at huge conferences and camps like Centrifuge and Crossings.  I may even know the next Lecrae (and hopefully marry him!)  They are going to be writing books that I turn to when I want to pull my hair out, and making the curriculum that I will use with my youth group.  What is weirder, I might be one of them!  Whoaaa!  Thinking about this has made the reality that “One Day, I’m Going to Be an Adult” almost more real.  Should I start writing my book?  Should I start getting the curriculum I just wrote for our WarZone published?  hahahaha.  Oh my.  Tis Strange.

On another still-weird-but-less-frazzled note, while I’m thinking of youth ministry majors, I’m quite disappointed with some of ours right now.  I’m beginning to realize more and more that people go into ministry to correct their own lives.  It is so incredibly sad!  This mentality is very common in my peers, that “I had a messed up youth.  So I’m going to go to college, major in youth ministry, and I will become reformed and help those in their youth to make up for my sin in mine.”  And honestly, I’m sure that I felt that at one time or another, that the program would help reform me.  Why shouldn’t it reform me?  But there needs to be a legitimate, specific calling to the ministry.  I don’t want to see more teenagers suffer because their youth minister committed a major sin and had to leave the church.  And that goes for me too.

I’m incredibly scatter-brained today.  God answered a huge prayer last night, but I still am not happy.  I don’t really understand it.  But I need to learn to rest in His grace and armor myself with His Strength.  I can’t fight whatever funk I’m feeling alone! oh no no nooooo…

Ministering to Middle School

youth ministry

Middle School is tough, but here is an article that I found helpful: The Best of the Best for Middle School Ministry | YouthWorker.com
The Best of the Best for Middle School Ministry
By Jeff Tillson | Junior High Pastor, Grace Fellowship UMC, Katy, Texas. | March 2010
Let’s face it—hanging out with middle school (I call it junior high!) students in the hopes of bringing them closer to Jesus takes serious guts. It is an energy-packed, patience-stretching, sometimes smelly, time-consuming, thankless, awkward and overlooked calling. We are clearly the only people on earth who could get away with belching a Bible lesson or having a swim party in the baptistry. Junior high ministry veterans would agree that ministering to young adolescents is a blast, but it also requires a great amount of wisdom and smart ministry on our part. This quick crash course in junior high ministry has been developed after 10 years of good and bad ideas. Some are originals; some have been said before; all are crucial to consider as you seek to reach this awesome age group.
Celebrate Their Energy
Junior high students have an abundance of energy. I have met many well-intentioned youth workers who have attempted to contain or correct this trait with little success. The truth is, to minister to this age group effectively we must celebrate and wisely direct this God-given electricity. If we don’t, junior highers will be tempted to misuse their energy by distracting people around them, running around with a fire extinguisher or playing floor hockey with the senior pastor’s commentaries. I am convinced there is a better way!
Strategically Placed Games: Who says we have to teach 35 minutes straight just like the high school ministry? Try the 15-Minute Rule: For every 15 minutes of teaching, include an energy-burning activity or game. Maybe the activity illustrates a point, or it could be completely random. A strategically placed activity might break your flow, but it greatly enhances a junior high student’s ability to stay mentality engaged. Side note: Call me unspiritual, but after a decade of junior high ministry, I am doing many more 15- or 20-minute lessons than 35-minute lessons.
Mission Trips/Service Projects: While all age groups benefit from active learning and service, I believe it is most important in junior high ministry. Use their energy to play games with kids living in poverty, organize donations, mix concrete or clean up a local park. Don’t let these opportunities be extras or just summer traditions. Breathe active service into the ongoing fabric of your intentional ministry to junior highers. Allowing service to become your curriculum will be a powerful faith-shaper in the lives of students.
Participatory Worship: For some reason, junior highers still love silly motions to worship songs. While I’m not a huge fan, they are! A wise youth worker won’t push them toward adult worship songs too quickly.
Score Points with Parents
Effective junior high ministry cannot be done without the support of parents. Junior high guru Kurt Johnston wrote, “…it really doesn’t matter who you are or what you can do. As a seasoned junior high youth worker, I can tell you that effective junior high ministry boils down to two things: The sovereignty of God and the support of parents.” Here are a few tips that will go a long way with parents.
Communicate: Don’t expect a squirrelly seventh grade boy to remember the details of the upcoming camping trip. Not going to happen! We must learn how to deliver the information quickly and effectively into the hands of parents through a variety of means: e-mails, text alerts, newsletters, Constant Contact—just find a way to do it well. In the life of a busy parent trying to manage the family schedule and a full work load, we can see how frustration mounts and support wanes if we don’t get them the information they need. Remember always to return their calls, answer all their questions and make time for them.
Prepare and Encourage: Parents will admit that they are unsure about their abilities to guide their children through the junior high years. Be proactive in preparing them for the issues they will face, and be gracious in your encouragement toward them along the way. Even if you are a younger leader and haven’t parented a junior high student, your experience and knowledge of students provides a unique window into their lives. This window can be incredibly helpful as you partner with the parents you serve.
Make It Easy: Do we really expect parents to drive their children up to the church three nights in one week? Is it smart to do a junior high retreat on a weekend when most families are swamped with other things? We score big points with parents when we go out of our way to make their lives a little easier.
Invite Them into the Action: When I was a younger leader, it took me awhile to realize that parents make some of the greatest volunteers. They live with these creatures, experience their drama and witness all the changes their kids experience. Some of them might even be crazy enough to accept your invitation to the frontlines of your ministry. What parent in your ministry is just waiting for an invitation?
Don’t Forget the BIGGIES: Friendship and Identity
If there are two areas in which junior highers desperately need guidance, they are friendship and identity. With a different schedule, fresh faces and new surroundings, the onset of junior high is a prime opportunity for students to make important decisions about the friends they choose. Friendships created in junior high can have a massive ripple effect (positive or negative) on a student’s spiritual development—not to mention their decisions, attitudes and place in society during their lifetimes.
In addition, the awkward physical changes coupled with the rollercoaster of emotions create a distorted view of their identity and self-worth. Girls and guys can express scathing disapproval of what they see in the mirror every day. We must talk, teach and mentor around these issues as often as appropriate. Beware of the nonverbal message your ministry sends to students on these topics, as well. What is your ministry doing to support the building of healthy, God-honoring friendships? Are you showing the popular students and the quiet loners that they matter to God? Good junior high youth workers constantly wrestle with these issues.
Capture a Larger View
For a die-hard junior high leader, this next sentence is difficult to write, but I know it to be true: In my church, I want junior highers to have an unstoppable excitement to be involved in high school ministry. It is a new, ridiculous attitude that God is cultivating in me; and I think we play an essential role in building their anticipation. For example, I choose not take junior highers on a sweet ski trip to Colorado or go out of the country on a mission trip as our high school students do. I want our high schoolers using the best spaces on Sunday night and doing “cooler things” with possibly a larger budget. This is not to say that I shy away from being a champion of junior high ministry or that junior high ministry should be lame. I just see wisdom in having a larger view of the spiritual journey that my kids are on—a journey of which (only by God’s grace and entrusting) I am able to be a part.
So stay committed, remain humble, laugh often and love generously. Thanks for joining me in reaching this young and sometimes overlooked people group. What an awkwardly important mission field we have before us!
Jeff’s Best of the Best Middle School Ministry Resources
Best Middle School Resource: Middle School Ministry Made Simple by Kurt Johnston (Standard)
Best Middle School Web Site:SimplyYouthministry.com
Best Middle School Event: Christ in Youth’s “Believe” conference (CIY.com/believe/)
Best Middle School Curriculum: The “Uncommon” series, General Editor Kara Powell (Regal)

If You Believe in Change, DO IT!

christianity, youth ministry

This is a pet peeve of mine that I have had for a very very very long time, and I think it’s time I blog about it. Ha!


One of my favorite self-made quotes that I have been saying for years is, “Don’t complain about something unless you are willing to change it.”

I will always say that, and I have made an addition appropriate for the rest of this blog’s rant: “NEVER complain about something you wish to change, unless you are ACTIVELY working to change it.”

After working with four different youth groups outside of my own experience being IN a youth group, as well as listening to stories from all my friends who have BEEN in youth groups, as well as being in youth ministry classes where I hear stories ABOUT different youth groups, there is a common theme: Teenagers want change in their youth group. They want more unity. They want to be close. But they don’t want to be the one to step out of their comfort zones and change it. So they sit back and complain.

My challenge to any teenage students is this: If you want a change to happen in your youth group, YOU need to be the one to initiate it. If you know that something needs to happen, something needs to change, ask God for wisdom concerning the area. The Bible tells us that if you are lacking in that area, to ask God and that He will graciously provide. If you realize a need for change, but don’t know how to change it, ask God for discernment.

This was a short rant, but I hope that you will take this to heart and apply it to every part of your life.