A year ago this last week, I embarked in my first paid role in ministry as an intern of a megachurch’s youth ministry.  I was the intern for the high school girls in a ministry of about 250 students.  My job was basically to develop a “core” of 18 ladies into leaders for the student ministry.  I was to do this by leading service projects, hosting pool parties, serving alongside them on a missions trip, being a camp leader, creating and getting HS leaders for a VBS-type thing for the middle school AND hanging out with them twice a week.  I also ended up filling in for a middle school Sunday School teacher.  I was BUSY.  I made some mistakes.  I thought I had it all figured out before I went into that role, but my pride in my education got in the way.  Here is a list of things I wish I knew before I went into this role.

1.  Not everyone wants to be my best friend.
First of all, not all of that 18 girls I was supposed to lead were even there that summer.  And maybe I took that too personally.  There are girls who are used to being the leaders, and do not want another leader “over them”, getting close to “their” friends and “their” followers.  High school girls WILL talk about you behind your back as a leader.  And I acted surprised!  When I remember calling my youth pastor’s wife a highlighter because of the lime green shirt she was wearing, talking about him behind his back.  And I was the student leader (Christian Karma?).  Nobody in high school wants to hang out with their youth leader 72 times a week…it’s just not going to end up well.  Spending so much time with ANYBODY will end in disaster, especially when girls are involved.  I to this day get frustrated when spending mass amounts of time with people, because their flaws jump out at you.  Also, I was the same distance from many of my core as I am from my best friend, who is 4 1/2 years older than me.  Being a leader does not mean being a best friend.

2. Teenagers still think concretely.
I should have listened more in my “Adolescent Development” class.  Teenagers are really struggling with trying to grasp onto ideas that are more abstract.  There are all these false dichotomies going on because of the incapability to reason with ideas that aren’t black and white.  Also, they aren’t going to understand all of my jokes.  I almost made this a whole separate point, but I won’t.  I was frustrated at one point when I said something that was okay in my “college” group of friends to say, but they didn’t understand it.  They thought what I said was terrible, but to me it was funny and okay.  That’s because in college you learn to think abstractly, and especially at my age are almost too abstract.  Also, don’t discuss NT Wright with teens out of the blue.  These kinds of abstract things, while important to discuss, need to be prepared for! (I find myself giggling and rolling my eyes)  When I say “but”, I better really mean that word because that means a disclaimer.  But I snapped out of that.

3.  Don’t make assumptions.
Just because a person has a nice house doesn’t mean they can afford camp.  Strong Christians don’t always go out with who they should or have the relationships they should.  Beautiful girls have just as hard of a time with their identity as those who aren’t so “beautiful.”

4.  My past can hold up my future.
Let’s be honest, I have a heavy past.  But I was too caught up on it.  I made it a block in relating with these upper middle class folks in the suburbs.  Can I relate to getting a car, especially a nice one for my 16th birthday?  Nope. I can’t think of a friend who did.  Do  I understand what it’s like to have seemingly unlimited money to spend on…whatever?  Nope.  But that doesn’t mean I can’t relate at all.  There are girls who don’t have Christian parents.  There are students who have seen drugs ruin their families and friends.  There are girls who go work in the inner-city and have seen what I’ve seen, even if haven’t resided there.  They still get it.  They share the MOST IMPORTANT thing with me–Christ.  Sometimes they made it a big deal that I couldn’t relate, but probably only because I made it a big deal first.  I was glorifying it too much.

5.  I am not into recreational youth ministry.
My internship was almost completely recreational.  My spiritual gift is teaching and administering.  I barely got to use those gifts.  I took a lot from that internship and applied it in terms of recreation, don’t get me wrong.  But when I look back and get frustrated at myself, I remind myself that I wasn’t really using my gifts.  My current ministry has rec, but it is focused on study.  That’s more my thang.

6.  I might be more into women’s ministry.
This is something I have been pondering.  I pledged to follow the Lord’s call for me, wherever that would be. I still think that is with teenagers.  But I have a bigger heart for women’s ministry and specifically teenagers.  They need somebody investing in them.  I saw that in some of the girls I interacted with.  It broke my heart when leaving them that they would no longer have someone investing in them.  Then I saw the leaders I trained rise up and take that place.  That’s another thing I learned: I am an equipper.  This could mean that somewhere along the road, I may equip the next generation of youth ministers.  I would tell them that they do not have it figured out, and never will. Yay!

You know, I would like to change the title. I needed to learn all of this.  I use it now.  I do not share a lot of the same political views with my current youth, but that doesn’t mean we can’t relate.  When they can’t see my way, I shouldn’t get frustrated, but remember where they are in their life.  I can’t make assumptions based off of their house, their car, what they eat, what they look like…and I can’t make my past a road block.  Sometimes it is, like when they talk about agricultural things (I knew one person who hunted in high school, there’s probably only that many down here who DOESN’T hunt–me. ha!).  But we share something greater.  I’m still learning, everyday.  And I need to be.  I have so much to learn from those younger than me.

I know some of the girls from that group read my blog.  I have a few things to say: One, I love you all.  You girls taught me a lot about life–how to have fun, how to serve Christ, how to be relational.  I wasn’t perfect, and neither were you. Thank “The Fall” for that.  But I still think of you often, pray for you, and stalk you on Facebook (that last one is probably the most obvious).  Thank you for giving me the opportunity to grow as a leader!  And please be gentle on your new intern.  She’s going to be going through a lot the next few months :)

If I am teaching Jesus’ words, if I am prophesying in God’s name, if I am doing service projects and going to Bible school, but have not love, I might as well be doing nothing at all; for I am nothing and am doing nothing if I’m not doing it with love.

God so loved the world that he sent his only son to die for us.

What great love God has given us, that we might be called his children!  His friend! His bride!

A man said to Jesus, “What must I do to get into heaven?” Jesus said, “First off, love God with all that you have. Second, love your neighbor as yourself.  This is the most important thing you can ever do.”

For true love is this: Jesus laid down his life for us. So that we might also do the same.

Love never gives up.
Love cares more for others than for self.
Love doesn’t want what it doesn’t have.
Love doesn’t strut,
Doesn’t have a swelled head,
Doesn’t force itself on others,
Isn’t always “me first,”
Doesn’t fly off the handle,
Doesn’t keep score of the sins of others,
Doesn’t revel when others grovel,
Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth,
Puts up with anything,
Trusts God always,
Always looks for the best,
Never looks back,
But keeps going to the end.

Love is greater than hope and even faith.

If you do not know love, you do not know God.

The greatest love is to give your life for your friends.  For your enemies. And for your God.

God is Love.

Love comes from a pure heart, a good conscience, and a sincere faith.

God will know his followers by love.

Love covers a multitude of sins; if we have sincere love for one another, we’d be committing a lot less sins.

My friends Kim and Jess wrote this song for me for my birthday :)

LYRICS:
Well it dawned on me when I logged onto Facebook
It’s Heather’s birthday, I knew with just one look
it had to be something great
that’s why we showed up late
a Redford lady straight from the hood
man i really wish that I could dance just like she could
and she really likes to laugh
and probably take baths

But we won’t hesitate
to celebrate
this day with you
it’s true
you’re turning 21
it’s so much fun
now you can drink
but you can’t cause you go to SBU

if there is a craft you bet she’ll be there
she’d probably take you up on any triple dog dare
her name is Heather Lea Campbell
and one thing she’s not is dull

I have spent 4-5 hours every day for the past week reading blogs by other youth ministers.  I don’t know why.  I don’t particularily like to read, although I am growing more fond of it as I’m reading material that I’m actually interested in.

One thing that I really like about reading these blogs is the sense of community that I feel.  I feel like I’m not alone in the ministry.  Sometimes it’s easy to feel that way.  Today I was feeling particularily discouraged because my students really want us to get bigger and do “huge things” like go to Mexico or have a huge conference (things that “first baptist does”!).

Anywho, if you are reading this, please pray for me :)  I have 2 and a half weeks left of my “break” before I start up the semester again.  I have 18 hours full of some of the most difficult classes I will ever take, along with “part-time” ministry (let’s be real, there’s no such thing as part-time), and another job.  This next few weeks, I need to get serious and plan out my year as much as possible, as well as start on some exegeticals that I know I will have to write.

I know this post is random, but hey, it’s 2:00 am and I have been consistently staying up this late for the past week.  Probably because I’ve been reading all these blogs. See! It all connects!

Blessings, love, and sleep,
Heather

ps, isn’t it weird to say that we are in 2011? weird.

January–I opened this blog. I had blogs before, but I vowed to be consistent with this one!  My 20th birthday was in January, which I spent alone.  I took a Pre-Marital counseling class during Jan-Term, got to strengthen my relationship with a few people, and also got to see the true character of a particular person. I ended a friendship with a manipulative person, who still finds ways to make me miserable.  I got to spend a lot of time by myself, which is actually a good thing. I got a lot of time to think!

February–A pretty chill month. Don’t think I learned any major lessons, didn’t really do much.  I don’t get all weird-obsessed over Valentine’s Day, so it was just a normal, apathetic month!  There was a dance for all us “single” people at a friend’s house, and I loved it!!  My closest girls and I went to Olive Garden, which was also pretty hilarious.

March–This was probably the hardest month of the year.  I had a fight with my mom and didn’t talk to her throughout this month, my grandpa was in and out of the hospital and began to die, one of my roommates attempted suicide, I had to quit my job because of my boss, I began having terrible migraines, I was stood up during spring break by my best friend, I had a fight with my mentor, applied for RA which I thought I was going to get with all my heart and then didn’t, my Facebook page for my business was deleted, and a woman moved in with my father. All in the same month! Actually, most of this was in the first two weeks! I had a lot of blows to the face, and throughout it all kind of just trusted that it would all pass.  I also had the opportunity to do a DNow–something I didn’t really want to do but in the end blessed me.

May–My grandpa died, and the whole experience was tough.  I finished the end of my sophomore year, and had a smoothie party to celebrate!  I also had a huge fight with my home pastor, who was preaching heresy and I was convicted to approach him and talk with him about his lack of presenting scripture.  He told me that if I wanted more scripture in my sermons, to find another church. So I vowed not to go back.  Very hard decision, considering I had gone there for 13 years (and saw it go through a lot of things and stood by it).

November–Bowling, Hand Turkeys, SO MUCH! There was just so much going on.  A good friend of mine from high school died a very tragic death, and that was really difficult to see. I blogged a LOT that much, because I was consistently learning new lessons.  I think that I was really vulnerable with my readers that month.

December–I was overwhelmed, but I had a great month! I had a lot of parties going on that I had to plan or attend.  I got to plan a Christmas program for the youth, which turned out good!  I went home and learned that it wasn’t my home anymore.  Christmas was the worst yet, but I’m okay about it.  It’s weird, really.  I learned a lot of lessons this month, and I’m still learning.  And at night on Dec. 31st, I found out the cat that I’ve had for 10 years passed away. This hit me hard; he was seriously my bestest friend and only friend for a long time! So I’m now dealing with that.

Today in my last class of the semester, a guest lecturer came and talked to us about our resumes and job interviews, and things of that sort.  She started a little bit about the impact our Facebook page has in that kind of thing.  So I started thinking, what does my Facebook page say about me?  What does your page say about you?  What kinds of things do you want it to say about you?

Here are a few pointers she gave (and that I am adding through my “expertise”) to help clean up your Facebook page and clear your name!

• If you are tagged in a photo that is provocative or sexual, untag it.  Better yet, if you are tagged in a photo, people can typically view the rest of the pictures in that album too. If there is anything in the entire album that can be misconstrued, untag yourself from the album itself.  Or go to your settings and block people you are concerned about seeing it from seeing photos you are tagged it.
• Remove friends that could ruin your image.  If there is someone who posts on your wall and curses, talks about some party you went to, etc., then you have a few options: (1) Tell them to not post in that tone or talk about that bad thing you did on your wall. (2) Delete them as a friend. (3) Go to your settings and make it so that they can’t post on your wall period. (4) Go to your settings and make it so that the people you are concerned about reading it can’t read posts by other friends on your wall. This setting doesn’t prevent them from seeing their comments on your statuses.  (5) Block posts from friends on your wall. (6) Block your wall completely so that you basically don’t even have one.  I just deleted 300 friends recently, and many were for this reason.  I got in trouble once with a parent of a church because someone posted a joke about Viagra on my page.  I thought the joke was hilarious, but it hurt my rapport with the parent and that summer interning was miserable afterwards.
• Remove pages you are a “fan” of that could hurt too. If that means music that could hurt your reputation, that might mean you have to delete it. Use discretion.  This goes for groups too. If I click on a group and there’s a bunch of cursing on it, I might think poorly of you.
• What are your quotes listed?  Are any of them suggestive? They might be funny to you, but it won’t be funny when you get in trouble for them.
• If you are really that worried about your page, make it so that no one can view anything on your page–pictures, posts, interests, etc. Then your page serves as a place where people can message you, like email, and where you can stalk other people.

Dear Sam,
This completely and utterly stinks.  I miss you so much.  I’m so ticked that your life was taken because of a drunk driver.  I’m sad that you were so young.  It sucks that it was the same week as the anniversary of Sam Lipka.  I just don’t even know what to say.

I remember when we first met in middle school.  We rode the bus together every day.  We were typical middle-schoolers.  One day we hated each other, but the next day we had each other’s backs.  I remember that you were one of the ones that brought a lot of new styles to Ferg Middle with you.  You were pretty much like Avril Lavigne, and we called you that.  We didn’t always get along, but we didn’t have to.  We bonded every day and I can’t ever remember a time where I hated you.
High school, we didn’t see each other as much, but our relationship definitely grew.  We are so different, but that never seemed a problem.  Remember Drama class? Our production of the Wizard of Oz?  I remember you telling me I only got the part of Dorothy because I didn’t do any other plays.  I also remember the countless laughs that we shared in that class. That class was boss!
We always seemed to have a class together.  In Brit Lit, I hated all the books.  But you loved them.  You loved English class and you were always reading something.
I will never forget your big purses, your distinct giggles, you making fun of my pledge to purity.  I remember “Bringing Dillon Back” and our Senior shirts.  What would you do for a jolly rancher? haha we thought we were so clever.  I remember laughing about your height, complaining about our huge breasts, and just the weird sexual jokes.  The notes we passed were hilarious, and filled with pictures of “turds” I cannot remember how that started, but it started pretty early in our relationship.  Even after high school, we joked about it over facebook, which was really our only interaction.  I thought it was crazy when your brother married one of my best friends growing up.  I laughed as we joked about me marrying you and your boo at the time.
I think one of my favorite things about you was that you were you.  You didn’t apologize for that.  You knew exactly who you thought you were.
I am going to miss you.  I think a lot of people are.  You had your friends, your enemies, your frienemies.  I’m learning how  fragile life is.  I’m also learning how important the relationships I had in high school really are to me.  I might act like high school meant nothing to me, but they did.  I miss high school sometimes, because we were so naiive and honestly, that was the simplist life would ever get.
Bleh.
Sam, I love you, and I’m learning through this.
Love, Heather :)

Halloween is my favorite holiday. I get a lot of smack for this, but I frankly don’t care! Halloween is just my favorite :)

I liked the old layout, but I wanted it to be more personal. Since I’m sharing my life with you guys, I want to REALLY share it! Hopefully this is more “me”. I love the feedback I get on my blog, even if people don’t directly post it to the blog itself! SOOO please keep it coming! I love the affirmation!

People keep asking me how my internship was this summer, so here’s the short answer: