Ministry

Trying to Find a Job in Student Ministry?

church, youth ministry

It’s weird that this is my most-viewed post, but here it is:

Trying to find a job in student ministry? It can seem overwhelming trying to decide where to start. Here are some starter points:

Email some of your connections; you may find you have more than you think:
  • professors from your university or seminary
  • the head of your area convention
  • past churches you have worked for, preached at, or been in any kind of connection with
  • youth pastors in other churches
Here are some organizations that help connect you to the right church.
Denomination Websites:
Here are search engines that are specifically related to finding church jobs:
Here are some “general” sites that combine most sites (like Monster, CareerBuilder, etc) into one for easy Job searches:
Look on Christian university websites:
Non-Profit Organizations
Camps

A special thanks to all of you who have been sending me sites to add to this list! Wouldn’t it just be easier if there was one place for all listings?

Using Twitter to Network in Ministry

media, networking, youth ministry

Some people don’t understand the “point” of Twitter.  I absolutely love Twitter.  Some use Twitter to get breaking news from sports teams, celebrities, and news corporations.  I do that.  Some use Twitter to post everything they are doing that day. I’ve occasionally done that.  Some use Twitter to be passive aggressive about something.  I’ve been guilty of that.

But my favorite usage of Twitter is networking, especially with others in Youth Ministry.  When I was in college, I was an officer in the Baptist Association of Christian Educators, a national organization of Christian educators dedicated to networking.  My position was to facilitate connections with others going into ministry within my university.  BACE became my and the other officers’ baby, as our understanding of the need of networking within ministry increased.  Why is networking with others in ministry important?  That’s simple.  Because ministry is relational; networking provides resources, encouragement, and communication.

Twitter is a great way to network.  You can connect with people without exposing your profile to “creepers” like on Facebook.  There are many people who I communicate with on Twitter that I wouldn’t “friend” on Facebook because they are two completely different kinds of networking.  Facebook is more for connecting with real-life friends.  Twitter is more for connecting with people who you may not have met in real life, but still gain some kind of relationship with without sharing too much personal information.

Here are some #TwitterTips for networking with others in ministry, thanks to Rachel Blom @youthleadersac, searching #TwitterTip, and some own interpretations and pet peeves…:

  • Follow religious leaders, other ministers from around the country/world, and teen news sources.  All three will give you a nice plethora of information.  Make “lists” on Twitter to keep track of different groups of people.
  • Be generous in retweeting others’ posts. It’s a compliment and builds connections.
  • Tweet a mixture of personal and professional tweets.  Why?  Because the professional tweets give people resources, the personal tweets give people a relationship.
  • Do not tweet your personal blog post multiple times a day.  Maybe twice, perhaps three times; but posting the same personal blog post more than that is grounds for the “unfollow” button.
  • Don’t make your personal Twitter your Twitter for your ministry group…if you tweet dozens of times a day, parents don’t want to read that.
  • Post prayer requests.  There are Twitter accounts dedicated to praying for youth pastors.
  • If a stranger legitimately replies to your post, respond! You’re not too good for any Twitter relationship (if the account is legit).
  • If you want your tweet retweeted, leave room so they can do so. When retweet others’ posts, add a comment so show then your appreciation.
  • #HASHTAG. This is how you will find people to network with.  Hashtagging makes it simple to find the kind of information you want and people to follow.  My favorites are #stumin, #youthmin, #uthmin, and #fammin
  • Post a variety of resources.  In my Twitter feed, you will see news stories, music to listen to, blogs, and products.  They are all related to Student Ministry, but there is a lot of different resources
  • Follow people who follow you. It’s just polite. And there must be some reason they want to follow you, so check that out.
  • Attracting followers means communicating with them.  Don’t expect to have 1000 followers if you don’t talk to any of them.
  • Put the type of people you want to follow you in your Bio. If you want to network with those in ministry, put you are in ministry. Simple.
  • Try tweeting at different times throughout the day and see when you get the biggest response.
  • Numbers aren’t everything. It can be pretty easy to gain hundreds of followers, but would you rather have numbers or community? (sounds like a Jesus Juke!)
  • Tweet people the way you would want them to tweet you.

There are many things I am missing. For more #TwitterTip, look up that hashtag on Twitter. Also, here are the official Twitter Rules.

Question: What #TwitterTips am I missing?

What I miss about Youth Ministry

church, leadership, youth ministry

Two months ago, I quit my job as a youth minister at a church in order to follow God’s will and move back to St. Louis to help out with my family. The last two months has been an extremely interesting time for me, as I graduated college and moved in with my grandparents transitionally, assisted in the transferring of my sister’s custody from my parents, and am learning what it means to rest and not do anything. I am job-seeking and often discouraged, because I miss doing ministry and can’t see my life doing anything else.

 Here are some things I miss about doing youth ministry (in no particular order):

  • Sword fights with middle school boys. 
  • Being in a library surrounded by exegetical commentaries. 
  • Having crazy stories to tell my friends and anyone else I force to listen about this week’s hilarious thing that happened to me/a youth. 
  • Rolling my eyes as the girls seek out “potential suitors” for me 
  • Teaching thrice a week…I love teaching. 
  • Discipling teenage girls one-on-one. 
  • Answering relationship advice from boys. 
  • Getting random gifts.
  • Helping students through sin in their life. 
  • “Excuses/Reasons” to be constantly in the Word. 
  • Being invited over for home cooking.
  • Students making fun of me because my car makes weird noises. 
  • “Thirsty Thursdays”—picking up teens from school and going to Sonic for happy hour. 
  • Commenting on every single one of their Facebook statuses…haha 
  • Feeling essential in their life when they need prayer for someone I don’t even know. 
  • I even miss being used as a chauffeur when they want to go to a sports game or concert and “need a responsible adult” to go with them. 
  • All-nighters.
  • Forcing Christian rap upon impressionable students.
  • Conversations about spiritual gifts.
  • That moment when I throw out some Greek and the HS boys think I’m legit. 
  • Working through crazy analogies with students, like “spiritual pants.”  I still am unsure about that one. 
  • Challenging students.
  • Being made fun of because I’m from the “hood.”
  • Building relationships with parents. Definitely one of my favorite things. 
  • Coming to my pastor when I’m worn out and venting without his judgment and getting straight-up counsel.
  • Thirty Hour Famine, camp, VBS, missions projects, all that good stuff.
  • I even miss complaining. I must be crazy.
  • The cards, notes, Facebook posts/messages, and hugs of encouragement from parents and other adults in the church.
I love ministry, and yearn for that time when I can do it again! :)

Green Lantern, Thi’sl, Fear, my new job, youth ministry…they all connect, I promise.

media, unchurched, youth ministry

If you have been reading my Twitter feed or my Facebook statuses, you probably know that now on top of being a full-time student and part-time youth minister, I also now put in 32 hours at a girls’ shelter every week.  This shelter is a transitional living setting for teenage girls who have a range of issues, with most being mildly mentally retarded (“low functioning”) and having anger/aggression issues.  They have either been taken away from their families, or their families have given them up to the foster system.   Most have assault charges, many from the shelter workers, and many from their family (siblings, parents, grandparents, you name it).  This is a tough job.  I’ve been having nightmares about these girls.  They are for the most part as sweet as can be, but they get mad from the smallest (and seemingly strangest) triggers.  And when they get mad, they are likely to get physical.  It’s a difficult job.

I’m passionate about teenagers and youth ministry, that is no secret.  I am working in a church, and I love it.  The problem I have had in church work is that I’m not dealing with “real” issues it seems sometimes.  When I left St. Louis, I knew eventually I wanted to do inner-city ministry.  I want to work with people whose lives have been traumatized by drugs, alcohol, promiscuity, and abandonment.  These are issues that I know about.  I was needing something more than these “perfect kids” (which I am thankful for at times–makes my job easy! ;)).  This job gives me girls that, although aren’t in the “inner-city” area, have the same kinds of issues.

But they kind of scare me, something that I didn’t really think would happen.  I suppose it’s because if a girl with anger/aggression issues gave me a dirty look, the old me in STL could intimidate her back.  She cursed at me, she could get it back.  She fought me, I could fight her back.  But that’s the old Heather, a Heather who wasn’t concerned about how to help these girls, but how to not get my butt kicked.  So I’m fearful–how do I communicate with these girls, get them not to fight me, and spread the love of Jesus Christ to them all at the same time?

We saw the movie “Green Lantern” together last week, and the movie had a great message that I didn’t realize until now–we are to operate from will, not fear.  Will should be the guiding fuel for everything we do, not fear.  Fear is the tool of the enemy; the enemy uses fear to attack us.  We should be using our innermost desires to guide our actions.  For these girls, they want to be loved.  They’re fearful that they can’t so they operate from that fear.  If they operated from their will, they wouldn’t really use harsh words.  They would do everything they can to help others, to be kind, to be fair, and to be everything that Christ was and is.

Another thing that really spoke to me is the song “I Signed up to Die” by Christian rapper Thi’sl.  This song is about missionaries–whether local or abroad.  I was reminded that I am a missionary to these girls.  My responsibility is to be Christ to them, because they have never seen him and have no clue what Jesus was about. And what if they attack me?  What if they hurt me?  I signed up for this.  They need someone who is fearless of them, someone who is there out of love.  Love that can ONLY come from the Father.

Live such good lives so that when they speak against you as doing wrong, they’ll see your good deeds and glorify God. 1 Peter 2:12 (Heather Standard Version)

This is what I need right now.  They think I’m wronging them every time I discipline them or restrict them from doing things that they want.  But when they speak against me as hating them, they’ll realize that everything I do for them is for their own good, and out of Love.  Reminds me of how we cry out to God, “God, why do you hate me?  What did I do wrong?”  Yet God has never left our side, never forsaken us; always had our best interest at heart, an interest that desires for us to be like Him.  That’s my responsibility with these girls.

Happy New Year!

youth ministry

Gotcha! It’s August!

You just walked out your door hoping to see snow.  Boy were you confused when you started sweating.

It’s a new school year.  I don’t have any advice, as I am a busy busy girl and don’t have much to say.  I’m thankful that there are 170342 youth ministry gurus out there to give you all kinds of advice on how to handle the new year of youth ministry.

Why am I blogging then?  I’m blogging a cool idea!

We are having a New Years’ party at Grace Fellowship!  Sunday we have Promotion Sunday, then after service the hospitality committee is putting on a lunch, and we’re having hotdogs and milkshakes (snocones too!).  Then that night is a great surprise!  We’re having a New Years’ party.  They are going to make a list of New Years Resolutions, play some games that would usually only be played on December 31st, and more!  I’m pretty pumped about this idea.

Now, it’s super tough trying to find supplies in the middle of August.  I called every Dollar Tree and Party City and Hobby Lobby within a 45 minute radius.  Nothing.  But I have an Amazon Prime account, so I ordered a few things off of there that will be shipped to my door Saturday! Bazinga!

Another cool thing we are doing this year is an idea called “Blessing Buddy”.  Each person is going to draw a name out of a hat, and they are going to go out of their way to bless that person.  We tried this for a month, and I saw a few flaws in it.  One, the night we draw names not everyone is there.  It may be easier to just assign names.  Two, how do we bless them?  My youth are taking manila folders and filling out an info sheet about them, then attaching it to the folder.  If they wanna decorate it, hey.  Then we are attaching them to the wall.  Their blessing buddy can creep on their folder, and if they make something small enough to fit in there, they can.  Or they can leave instructions in there and lead them on a scavenger hunt to their real present….ooo.

Well, there are two fun ideas for you.  Let me know if you do any of them and how they go!

Questions:
How do you handle the New Year in youth ministry?
What are some new ideas you are excited to implement?

Why the Honeymoon Has to End

church, leadership, youth ministry

I heard repeatedly in my college youth ministry classes that in ministry, there is always this initial “honeymoon” that each minister goes through.  For a few months if you’re good, half a year if you’re lucky, a year if the church has their heads in the clouds just like you…haha.   I didn’t believe it in class, and even had an arrogance to how long I could go before it did.  The honeymoon has to end eventually though.  Why?

1.  Because you’re bound to screw up eventually.
I went 9 months strong before my honeymoon ended.  Every time I messed up, I would “wince” to how harsh the punishment could get.  Like the time we painted our youth room and paint got all over the church…we cleaned it up quickly but you know there is going to be that one kid that talks and tells the wrong person ;).  Or the time I drove on the wrong side of the road (in my defense, it was a country road at midnight, and the youth assured me I was doing the right thing).  But those weren’t what hurt me thankfully, because those are the things that get addressed immediately.  What are the mistakes that get us in trouble?  Lack of communication with parents, with students, with other church leaders.  And yes, the occasionally “dumb” accident like I stated.  We’re human.  We screw up.  We say “crap” to the wrong person and it offends them.  We get a ticket from speeding in the church van.  Someone breaks an arm on the slip-in-slide we made slick with Tide.  It’s bound to happen that we screw up.

2. Because you finally understand the flaws of the ministry you are serving.
The first few months you kind of go through the motions, “try out” some different programs or formats of youth meetings, grow relationships, but most importantly get a grasp of who are the student leaders and who needs the most attention.  You understand why the church or youth group isn’t growing.  You begin seeing why teens come on Wednesday nights and not Sunday mornings.  And these are things that start bothering you inside.  Tension grows between you and whatever aspect of the church/ministry you feel is a hindrance–is it the music? preaching? volunteers? the students? yourself?  These things start piling up, little thing by little thing, and they result in a burn-out.  I know that in my “Christian Ministry Apprenticeship” class, we talked about all kinds of mock situations that would happen in church, and I would boldly say exactly what I would do.  My professor loved my energy and enthusiasm, but called me naive.  I understand why now.  When those situations arise, we rack our brains 24/7 trying to come up with how to solve the solution, how to talk to your pastor or another person about it, etc.  I can rehearse in my head 2340874 times how I want to talk to Church Council about something, but it never comes out the way it sounds in my head.  So sometimes we don’t say it.  And our ministry hurts as a result of our “good intentions” of not hurting others or our paycheck.

3.  Because you are drained…and need a vacation.
Except when you are a minister, you can call it a sabbatical and it makes it sound needed, not just for fun!  People don’t understand how draining ministry can be.  Putting any conflict aside, it’s draining pouring out your life to individuals who frankly don’t care most of the time (especially if you don’t get the response you desire). Burn-out is bound to happen.

Don’t get me wrong, the honeymoon ending stinks.  But it is necessary.  Now that your head is out of the clouds, you can honestly address the needs of the ministry and of the church.

Questions I have for you reading:
How do you address these situations in your church?
What do you do when you are burned out?

Best. Event. Ever.

youth ministry

Being a small youth group rocks.  In the future when I get bummed out because “we’re not as big as first baptist” or other reasons related to our size, I’m going to have to remind myself of this weekend and the success it brought our ministry.

This weekend we had a family camping trip to a nearby camping area.  On Friday afternoon, the ladies and I headed up early to work on our tans, bond, and find our camps.  That evening, two more families joined us.

This was my favorite event by far, not because of numbers or anything like that, but because of the fellowship that was created.  One of the boys kept relishing in the fellowship that camping brings, and he had a huge point.  Camping causes people to work together in order to survive.

The other reason I loved this event was the time I got to spend with parents.  Our little Baptist church has monthly fellowship dinners in which I try to eat with different families, but camping brought more bonding than just our average Baptist potluck.  I got to see how the teenagers and parents interact with each other–their parenting techniques, the way the teens respond to them, and the dynamics of the families as a whole.  I now understand a few of the the teens a whole lot better just by getting to spend a weekend with their families.  The two families that went got to know each other a whole lot better, and pointed out to me that even though they had been in the same church for three years, they have never talked as much as they did just in that one night.

SUCCESS! *ching ching*
(I don’t know that the ching ching noise is for, but let’s roll with it.)

Our ministry is going to be going through some changes here soon, and I think this weekend was an awesome, and needed time to relax, destress, and grow together.  This is true fellowship.  Hopefully we can do something to this effect in the future, where we bring families together in order to grow our ministry.  As I pointed out to one parent, it’s not my duty to just minister to the students, because that just makes me their babysitter.  It’s my duty to minister to the family as a whole.

Our Ministry "Halos"

leadership, music, youth ministry

Something I really struggle with in ministry is learning how vulnerable I can be with my students.  As in, how much of my sin do I show them?

I remember a child coming to me last year asking me about Jesus.  I asked her, about 7 or 8 years old, if she did bad things, AKA “sinned.”  She agreed.  I said, “You’re right! You sin, your mom sins, I sin, even your leaders Pam and John sin!” (the leaders of the community center, names changed because frankly I can’t remember them).  She responded with, “Whoaaaaaaaa…”  She didn’t realize that everyone, including people she looked up to, did bad things just like her.

I think our students have forgotten that we, their leaders, sin.  I personally royally screw up daily.  But how much do I tell my students?  How vulnerable do I get with them?

I don’t claim to have all the answers, but here are two things I am learning:

1. You need to be vulnerable.
A few months ago, we were talking one night about anger; how we can’t come before God with a pure heart if we are still angry with a brother or sister.  I was, dare I say “preaching” for a moment, then it hit me:  I had two people in my life that I needed to make amends with.  And I shared this with them.  This really helped me teach.  The next week, I told them the progress I had made, and through my life lesson was able to teach them.  I tell them that I struggle with pride, but that’s a “safe” sin.  What if it’s not a “safe” sin to talk about it the church?  Read on.

2.  They don’t need to know every detail.
I partied in high school.  I consumed alcohol and did not honor my pledge of purity.  How much do I tell them?  What do I say?  Obviously, I don’t tell them what kinds of drinks I thought were tasty, which ones had the worst hangovers, etc.  But what about when it comes to purity?  What do they need to know?  Saying, “Well, I didn’t have sex, but I wasn’t doing what I needed to be doing.”  Then their minds start racing, and their respect for their youth leader, does it vanish?  What do I say?  Sex isn’t one of those things that seems “safe” to talk about in church, especially with a group of teenagers.  But it is so necessary.

3.  We are held to a higher standard.
This is the tough part.  In my last post, I talked about how teenagers thing very concretely; so speeding may be considered an awful sin to one, saying “crap” may be considered a sin, etc.  Basically, if an action is questionable, we shouldn’t do it.  This makes me think about the age-old question: Do we listen to “secular” music in the church van?  What if they realize I know the lyrics?  Do I lose respect?  I’m posing too many questions to answer in this post.  This is also where we remind ourselves that we are LEADERS and not FRIENDS (well, friendly leaders).  They don’t need to see how I know every word to Ke$ha in order to like me.  In fact, I should probably not brag about that right now.  Everything is permissible, but not everything is beneficial.  Some famous dude said that…;)

4.  They need to understand that we are not to be put on a pedestal.
Students need to understand that even their leaders fall into sin.  Period.  I am not perfect.  They need to remember that the only model we have of what it looks like to lead a perfect life is Jesus Christ himself.  Does this justify us leaders to do whatever the heck we want?  Definitely not.  Even the holiest people sin; this shouldn’t discourage us but encourage us to follow the one example we got.  And going back to point 3, we DO need to try to be that example to them, yet we ain’t gonna get it right.

Here is one of my favorite songs that reminds me not to put myself on a pedestal:

Also, I wanted to post a song that I came out when I was in high school.  I LOVED it; it was on my favorite show, One Tree Hill.  It’s called “Halo.” enjoy! :)

As you can see, I by no means have this figured out.  I need help in this.  I’m really struggling.  I need to be respected as a leader, yet I need to relate.  Do I use my own experiences?  What do I say about things?  What about the sin I struggle with now?
Youth pastors, how much do you share with your youth?

Free Student Ministry Curriculum: Poverty

lessons, youth ministry

One of my “platforms” in ministry (because we all have them) is poverty and other social injustices.  This is in part from experiencing poverty first-hand and seeing God’s provision.  But it’s also in the fact that I cannot hear about the 30,000 children dying each day from malnutrition and not be moved, not want to do something about it.  I can’t hear about the millions around the world dying from AIDS because they aren’t educated, dying from malaria and other diseases that are perfectly preventable.  I just can’t.

When planning for the 30 Hour Famine, I realized that there seems to be a lack of curriculum dealing with poverty.  So I went hunting!  Here is a list of some curriculum that I found, thought wasn’t too shabby, and suggest for youth groups to use!

Perspectives on Global Poverty–$10 or download online for a donation (or for free). 8 Lessons
The Least of These: God, Poverty, and You–$50. By the YM360 team! There is a free sample on the site so you can preview a full lesson before you buy! 4 Lessons
30 Hour Famine: How to Study the Bible–Free. Written by Tim Schmoyer.  You need to scroll down a little for this! 4 lessons
Ending Poverty in Community–Free. 6 Lessons
Hungry for the Kingdom–Free. Written by Kara Powell and Fuller Youth Institute especially for 30 Hour Famine. 4 Lessons
Bead for Life–Free. Not faith-based, but interesting facts and approaches.
The Five Talents–Free. or 4-6th grade, but can be adapted for other grades. 4 lessons.
Compassion by Command: Perspectives for Urban Ministries–$50. Targeted towards urban ministries. 4 Lessons.
Taking Root: Hunger Causes, Hunger Hopes–Curriculum for the whole congregation! Varies in prices (about 2.50 per book)
Hunger and Malnutrition–Free. Not faith based, but great curriculum nonetheless. Differing age groups. 3 Lessons.
Poverty Curriculum–Free. Not faith-based. Has curriculum on differing aspects of poverty.
Walk With the Poor–Free. Light curriculum. 4 Lessons

If you have any others, or have used any of these, please comment and let me know!  When I am finished writing my 30 Hour famine curriculum, it will get posted here:  _______ :)

Miriam: a woman of Position, Pride and Prejudice

bible, god, lessons, women

On Sunday mornings, I have the privilege to take my already-small youth group and break it down to where I teach an even smaller group for Sunday School.  I contemplated if I wanted to change the way I do Sunday School since the group is so small, but I like that I only have to teach the high school girls on Sunday morning.  And it’s enabling us to do the Women of the Bible right now!

So I planned on doing Women of the Bible, and I planned on doing Miriam yesterday…then Sunday Morning I found out the middle school boys’ teacher was gone, so they came in with me.  Oops!  But this lesson STILL spoke to them!  Awesome :)

Miriam was Moses’ sister.  I honestly knew very little about her, even though I’m taking a Pentateuch class, even though I’ve read through Exodus, even though I’ve heard the Moses story 3974421 times AND have taught on it before.  But no matter how many times I read a passage, I find that God still finds ways to teach me (just as when I taught Jonah!)

Miriam was a leader.  In fact, in Micah it says that Moses, Aaron, and Miriam were the ones who lead the Israelites.  God acknowledged her as important and essential.  She led the women in praise after they crossed the Red Sea.  She led the women to adorn the tabernacle.  Not only was she a leader, but the Bible names her a prophetess, meaning that God spoke to her.  This is a very special title for someone.  There is no doubt about it–God was using Miriam in special ways.

But we find in chapter 15 that Miriam and Aaron got a little jealous.  And I can just imagine this whole thing take place–I’m SURE that Miriam had to start this gossip, as I know how women are (and she was the one punished!).  They start talking about Moses’ wife, an Egyptian woman of who God had no problem with.  So why were they against this woman if God had not said Moses could not marry her?  Most likely had something to do with their own prejudices against darker skin.  Then one of them suggests, “Has not God spoken to us too?”

Uh oh.  Pride alert! WEEEEOOOOOOOWEEEEEOOOOOWEEEEEOOOOOO! (that’s a siren sound!)

I love this part:  God comes down in a pillar of smoke. Ha! Calls the three of them together into a meeting room.  Then God blocks the doorway with the smoke!  I can just IMAGINE being Miriam!  It’s like I just hit my sibling, and I turn around and Daddy’s at the door with the paddle!

And a spanking Miriam got!  She turned white with leprosy, an ironic punishment for two reasons: (1) Her prejudice against Moses’ wife had to do with her skin color, or the fact that she looked different from everyone else.  Now Miriam would look different from ALL of them!  (2) Miriam wanted power, she wanted to be recognized.  But having Leprosy means that she would be exiled.  She wouldn’t be able to be around people in order to lead them.

Aaron quickly humbled, as he turned to Moses and said, “My lord, do something!” Calling Moses “lord” showed his respect for him.  Then Moses talked to God, and asked him to do something.  And God stood his ground in his punishment, but compassionately let it only last 7 days.

You see, God knew what he was doing.  God knew that Miriam was usable, that’s why he chose her in the first place!  God could have just wiped her off the planet, struck her down, turned her to dust.  But he gave her a punishment that was fitting.  She needed to be humbled, and I think after this she was.  I can’t imagine the “Walk of Shame” that took place as she walked back to camp.  What’s amazing is, it was time for them to move on in their travels, but they waited for her.  They obviously respected her a lot.

This story shows us that even God’s greatest leaders can struggle with pride.  It also shows us that if a person has pride, God will knock it out of them!  The punishment will be devastating, but needed.

When I was little, I got some whoopins.  I grew up with boys, and they were constantly getting me in trouble.  But spankings didn’t change my attitude, so my mom came up with a new punishment:  essay writing.  Oh, how I hated this!  It lasted hours, it caused me to think about what I did, in many cases it was pretty ironic because I usually said dumb things and had to pay for them…and it was rewarding.  I changed my behavior.  It humbled me to think about the stupid things I did, and I learned.  Great job, mom!

Our Daddy is doing the same thing when he punishes us.  Encouraging, but scary.  Sometimes the spanking is quicker and “painless”. ;)