New Years’ Goal-Setting Workshop

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With the New Year comes a time to set new goals. Whether you choose to do a SMART plan, a “word” for 2021, or make a half-hearted promise over the champagne toast, 80% of New Years’ Resolutions fail by February.

In my opinion, the reason resolutions fail is because they are too vague. We don’t think through the potential obstacles, hard conversations, or limiting beliefs that holds us back from achieving something, even if it could literally change our lives. Then we find ourselves believing that we can’t actually achieve our goals, because we believe we have “tried before,” even though our attempts were really half-attempts.

As your coach, I’ll provide the tools to help you conquer 2021. No more excuses for incomplete dreams, failed visions, and another year of not hitting resolutions.

Group Workshop – $20

Ideal for someone who already knows what goal they want to set, and doesn’t mind setting it in a group setting. Groups will be capped at 10 people.

There are three times to choose from –

  • Saturday, January 2nd at 10am EST
  • Sunday, January 3rd at 1pm EST
  • Thursday, January 7th at 8pm EST

Individual Session – $50

Ideal for someone who wants a more individual approach, especially if they feel what will get them “unstuck” is undetermined yet.

Times will be on Fridays & Saturdays throughout January, although an alternative time can be scheduled by contacting Heather directly.

If you decide to add on a 3-month coaching package, it will be discounted by $100.

Serve-at-Home Saturday

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I am convinced that the best ideas in ministry come from being curious about what other youth ministries are doing, and then adapting them to fit your own context — and this is 100% true for my new favorite service activity during this season, Serve-at-Home Saturday!

This idea came from Queen Katie Edwards, over at Saddleback. She cheered me on as we adapted to our context! Because Queens cheer on Queens.

Since BINGO on Instagram was so hot last month, we decided to go that route for our students — complete a BINGO, and you get a prize! We delivered small care packages the following week with snacks, a branded Youth Ministries Magnet, and some candy.

Here is what it looked like!

Use this link to download from Canva and use for yourself!

This month we are doing it “Scavenger Hunt” Style. We are still creating what this looks like, but we are partnering with our Children’s Ministry so that it’s an activity for the whole family! Families will have to complete one activity from each category:

  1. Serve your HOME
  2. Serve your NEIGHBORHOOD
  3. Serve your CHURCH
  4. Serve your COMMUNITY

Many of the activities are the same as the ones from the Bingo Board, with some additions that make it more kid & family-friendly. I’ll update this post with what we decide to go with!

Navigating Screen-Related Addictions and Teenagers in the Midst of COVID-19

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With schools closed for the rest of the school year, data says that most children ages 6-12 are spending at least 50% more time online, with no definitive statistic for teenagers. But as I talk to our teenagers, and use my instincts from my personal increased screen time, I can guess that that most of our tweens and teens are spending most of their days online.

It’s no one’s fault, really, that our whole lives have turned into online lives. Everything we do now happens there – our learning, our work, our television, our hangouts with friends, even ordering our food. Our entire lives have gone almost completely digital, and in many ways it’s helping us feel more connected.

But there are many dangers that happen when we increase our screen time –

  • Exposure to pornography, which happens for the first time at an average of 8-11 years old
  • Being “numbed” by the violence and sexualization of television shows and movies
  • Feeling fatigued by online meetings and gatherings, even adding to long-term loss of emotional or social intelligence
  • Poor eating habits as we snack while Netflix’ing
  • Depression from over-exposure to sad news

These dangers are increased for our teenagers, whose prefrontal cortexes are not fully developed until age 25. Teenagers are in a crucial stage where what they consume can actually define the way their brain looks for the rest of their life. Psychologists call this the “use it or lose it” principle; that what you are exposed to in the teenage years lasts forever, and the parts of your brain that you engage are the parts you engage for your lifetime. This is why we often teach foreign languages for the first time in middle school – because this is when your brain is the most vulnerable to keeping new pieces of information.

Of course, addiction to bad behaviors can happen at any age, but considering most of our students’ screen time is unsupervised and the risk they are especially under, my point is to be cautionary during this period of time.

So what can you do?

MONITOR WHAT THEY’RE TAKING IN

I cannot say it enough: Look at your students’ search history. Take a look at what’s in their feed on Instagram or Tik Tok from their phone so you can see what is advertised to them. While Instagram can be an innocent app, you might be surprised as to who is messaging them or what is on their search page – that is the content they look at!

There are even ways to monitor their phones. If you have open communication with your teen (which hear me: is not easy to have), ask them what they look at. Ask them if they’ve ever seen a pornographic image. Open up the dialogue and see what they say.

LIMIT THEIR SCREEN TIME

A feature I find cool on Apple Products is the Screen Time feature – you can limit how much time is spent each day on it. You can password protect that time, as well. I have it set so that I only spend a certain amount of time each day on social media and games.

I also encourage you to set limits like no screens after a certain time or screens only in certain rooms of the house. And unless your child relies on their phone as an alarm clock, I encourage you to remove screens at bedtime.

CHANGE THE TYPE OF SCREEN ACTIVITIES THEY DO

Often when I tell parents about the “use it or lose it” principle, one of the first questions I get is, “So, should our kids play video games?”

My answer? Actually, yes! But consider the games they play and what it is teaching their brains. Games that involve strategy or physical movement or healthy competition could be really great for teens. Games like first-person shooter games should be more limited. I think Fortnite is a blast, but I also think it should have time limits and “real life” should be returned to.

GIVE THEM OTHER ACTIVITIES TO DO

“Back in my day, all I had were Barbie Dolls and Legos.” It’s true, the world has changed a lot in 20 years. When I was a teenager, I’d ride my bike all over the neighborhood, get in trouble for coming into the house covered in mud, and on rainy days I would read books and make crafts.

This is a great time to get a little old-school. I’ve loved watching families sew masks together, play Monopoly, and garden. I’m curious if this is the time to do more activities where we step away from our screens and get creative!

I also think taking breaks during the day is important, too! Taking an hour to paint or have a 15-minute dance party just to get away from the grind of E-learning is a fun way to give the eyes a break.

ENFORCE A BEDTIME

Students have shared with me (and they could be making this up, who knows?!) that they’ve been staying up until 3am, even 5am, on their devices, and then sleeping until 1pm.

I waiver on the issue of trying to keep as much normalcy as possible, because like, we are going through a global trauma right now. Just this evening my friends had to give in and let their kindergartner have bubbles in her bath, even though that’s a “Saturday thing.” Each day we pick our battles and some things just aren’t worth fighting for.

But when we think about teens and what they need, they actually need more sleep than any other age group; 9-10 hours! Enforcing a solid sleep schedule with our teens (and giving them grace to sleep in, since they usually get far less than this), is really important.

WALK THE WALK

When I talk to teenagers about their screen usage, they totally throw their parents under the bus. They talk about how their parents are always looking at their phones, taking business calls, etc. And look, no judgment; my husband and I have conversations about screens and how it impacts our relationship often. And while screens seem like an easy escape when we are annoyed with one another, I have noticed that screens actually cause us to disconnect more.

When I was a teenager, my mom would say to me, “Do as I say, not as I do” and I would retort, “Actions speak louder than words.” Teenagers are brilliant. And so, if we have an expectation for them, it is fair that we follow that expectation ourselves.

I love the way the book Right Click approaches this topic, as they talk about creating a family covenant for screen time. This makes it so that it’s not just on the teenager to create better habits, but so that it’s for the whole family.

This time is unprecedented. There is no research that tells us what to do or how to behave. But six weeks in, we are beginning to notice that some habits are forming in our teenagers that have the potential to cause damage permanently.

At St. Luke’s, we want to partner with you. If you want to talk through any of this with us, don’t be afraid to reach out! This time is confusing, but we have resources to help you through it.

My Happy Planner

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For Christmas, my little sister gave me a Happy Planner, and I couldn’t be happier!

(What? I had to make that joke)

I wanted a planner that could do several things for me:

  • I wanted it to start on Monday and end with Sunday (since Sunday is the “pinnacle” of the week)
  • I wanted an hourly schedule, but I didn’t care so much about Friday or Saturday since I’m “off” typically on those days
  • I wanted a place where I could write out my habits
  • I wanted a place for a looooooooooong to-do list
  • I wanted a space for the items that I do EVERY week
  • I wanted a TON of space for notes in the back

I decided to go for the Happy Planner, because:

  • You can take pages in and out as much as possible, which means a never-ending notebook at the end of my planner
  • You can use their special hole-punch to put in notes from meetings, hand-outs, or other important information (like budgets, school calendars, yearly performance objectives, metrics, etc!)
  • This also means that you can create your own planner and put it in!

Okay, so obviously you know where I’m going with this: I created my own planner pages.

But first, let’s talk supplies:

  • I started with this planner! I chose the Happy Planner Notebook, because it comes with pre-punched note paper, and not a calendar. I wanted to make my own planner!
  • I purchased bigger rings. There are three sizes, and I wanted the medium size! But okay, I purchased the mega size, too.
  • I purchased just a butt-ton of stickers.
  • Some people love washi tape. I’m mixed.
  • THIS IS IMPORTANT: the punch! This is what turns ordinary paper into Happy paper.
  • I am also OBSESSED with these sticky notes.
  • Thick project paper to print Happy Planner sheets on!

Now if you AREN’T into making your own planner calendar, note that there ARE some already out there! There are also some you can purchase off of Etsy.

But here are my pages: DOWNLOAD HERE

  • I love that each week, my to-do tasks that never change are already written on my planner. Before, I had to write them down every single week.
  • I also love that I have a space where I can write out exactly how Sunday is going to go.
  • I decided to make my pages without months/dates, and utilize Happy Planner Stickers to fill those in.
  • I wrote pre-existing stuff in a lighter font, so that it’s easier to write over if I need, although I do love me some white-out tape.

And here are two examples of how I use them!

Here is another week!

With COVID-19 changing my schedule so that I work from home (and my weekly appointments look different now), I decided to change up my pages — here is what it will look like next week!:

I love this new format because I have a space on the right page for different projects that I’m working on! And of course — Women in Youth Ministry has its own spot!

Every time I am completed with a month, I take that month out and file it into a folder — if I need to reference that month in the future, I have it! But it’s not taking up space in my planner.

Other things I’ve hole-punched and keep in my planner:

  • Our all-church calendar (printed from our Google Calendar)
  • Our Youth Calendar, including dates that schools leave for spring/fall/winter/summer breaks.
  • My performance objectives for the year
  • My personal goals
  • A printout of the most recent metrics
  • A printout of the most recent budget report
  • A list of my weekly work-flow (it explains my job just in case I were to get sick!)
  • A few other printouts that I like to keep on me at all times.
  • A hefty notes section in the back.
  • (Because of all these additions, I only have 6 months of printed months at a time — which is why I archive completed months and have a full calendar in the front of my planner!)

I’d love to see the ways that you are using your planners — so PLEASE tweet me your pics!

**By using my Amazon Affiliate Links, I will receive a small amount that helps keep my blog and Women in Youth Ministry alive! Thanks!

COVID in the Midst of Lent

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If you’re like me, you are mourning right now. You’re morning all the cancelled events – Spring Retreats, Mission Trips, summer camp, Confirmation, Easter Sunday, weddings.

It’s a lot.

The tendency, at least for me, in situations like these where there is so little that I can control, is to over-compensate, over-program, and over-plan. And since the news of COVID-19 hit hard last week with the president’s press conference, that’s all I’ve done:

  • I’ve stayed up way too late creating ideas, clocking in hours far outside of my pay grade.
  • I’ve been up at 4am, anxiously thinking about families and what they’re going through.
  • I’ve acted like I’m a video editor, trying to film videos and piece it all together like a professional.
  • I’ve tried to come up with daily “pep talks” and devos on Instagram.

And I can already say that in the last week I’ve already tried two things to reach students and have failed.

It’s a lot.

I’ve felt my chest tighten with anxiety, as I try to figure out how to balance ministry, reach kids, support parents, take care of my own family – and oh yeah – not get sick.

Today I was in the middle of a freak-out when I heard the words, “Be still and know that I am God.” (Psalm 46)

Be still? Are you crazy, God? I got a ton to do! And it’s all for you! If I don’t get it together, your kingdom will collapse.

What’s so ironic to me about this pandemic is that it is during a time of the year when we are supposed to be still – Lent. We are supposed to subtract things away that distract us in order to becoming closer to God, and yet in church life we end up adding so many more things as we try to reach people during the busiest time of year in church life.

I find it so ironic that we are forced to halt as a church during what we like to call the “Super Bowl of the Church.”And as heartbreaking as it is to sacrifice Easter Sunday, Confirmation, Graduation, and Spring Retreats, what if this was a chance to embrace what Lent is really about?

I became burdened by my own hypocrisy this week, as I spent an entire day creating content, suddenly realizing that I was just creating “more” for families to do together. From our church alone this week at least 4 emails were sent out to families, plus a daily devotional via Instagram, Facebook, and email; plus two newsletters from our senior pastor; plus a personal invitation to a Wednesday night Zoom class; the list goes on…

If Lent is about subtracting the things that distract us from getting closer to God, then what can we do to limit the “noise” that families ingest? How can we set ourselves apart from the communication that is sent from the schools or the local news? How can we embrace what Lent is all about?

Here are a few suggestions:

  • Create a “hub” on the church website where families can review resources. I’m obsessed with this one by White Rock UMC in Dallas.
  • Combine newsletters into one. Rather than having a separate Preschool/Elementary/Middle School/College newsletter, create one for the whole family!
  • Text/call parents. Spend the time you would have spent creating things to foster connection. Ask them how they’re doing and what you can pray about.
  • Don’t over-create. There’s no need to create your own mid-day devotional for students, if your church already has one.
  • Back off of event promotion. Let’s just get through one season at a time.
  • Deploy Small Group Leaders. If you are in a medium-to-large sized youth group, ask your SGLs to create Zoom hangouts, group chats, Netflix Watch Parties, or Smash Bros parties. Let them foster connection however is most natural, and support how you can. And as we “return back to life,” encourage small group events versus large group events.
  • Don’t be afraid of failure. So, maybe Zoom youth groups aren’t going to work for you. Maybe you don’t get the numbers. That is okay. Not everything is going to work or look pretty.

This is a time for the church to listen to the needs of families and deploy the church outside of these 4 walls. That doesn’t automatically equate as “we need to do more.” It just means that we do things different.

So, be still. Listen. And don’t be afraid to dial it back this season. If you’ve done your job properly up until this point, families will know you’re there for them without the constant reminders. Be innovative and creative, but don’t be afraid to be still.

How I did Zoom Youth Group!

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I saw quite a few of my millennial friends in ministry talking on the internet this last week about how indispensable my generation — who are often thought of as lazy, entitled, and obsessed with the internet — are finally proving their worth to the church! If there is one “good thing” that can come out of COVID-19, it’s that all of our millennials in ministry finally get to step up and shine with their e-gifts.

But if I was to be honest, I feel totally out of my league when it comes to moving the church online. And I had a “moment of crisis” last week when I realized that I was creating a lot of things, but what was I doing to foster authentic community?

Today we launched our first Zoom Youth Group, and it went FANTASTICLY. there were definitely some points of troubleshooting, but I’d love to share with you all we did!

Here is an overview of our “order of worship,” and then I’ll talk specifically about some of our steps.

  1. Intro
  2. Game
  3. Announcements
  4. Prayer
  5. Teaching
  6. Small Groups

Intro

  • First, let’s talk about Zoom! We used a PAID FEATURE, because it allows you to screen share and put students into breakout groups.
  • Click here for a brief on Zoom by my friend Josh at Stuff You Can Use
  • A half hour beforehand, I texted out the link to all of our parents utilizing our Church Database software.
    • I reminded parents to help their students get set up, since I have 5th-8th graders.
    • WHAT I LEARNED: Tell students to specifically put first and last name and grade. This makes it easier for breakout groups!
  • Until students came on, I played this countdown video. I downloaded it, and clicked “screen share.”WHAT I LEARNED: any noise I make is conveyed, even if I’m screen-sharing. You can’t mute your mic and have your video play. At least, I think.
  • I played a playlist as the video played of some of our favorite songs!
  • I left a few minutes to allow everyone to get on!
  • I made sure to hit “mute all” and clicked “don’t allow participants to unmute themselves.” A friend of mine had a student meow during prayer!
  • I also made sure that they could not screen share so there were not Zoom Bombers.
  • I also sent a MS Email to our families earlier this week with all this info — so that if they couldn’t tune in, they at least could at home. It also included some links to resources!

Game

We played a “Scavenger Hunt” with our Middle Schoolers, and this free DYM game with High School.

We had our middle schoolers find the following items:

  1. Fridge Magnet
  2. Roll of Toilet Paper
  3. Banana
  4. Hand Sanitizer
  5. A Pet
  6. Your parent
  7. Rubber band
  8. A pair of mis-matched socks
  9. A school picture
  10. A Bible!

When they found their item, they “raised their hand” using the feature. I wrote their names down, and will send them a gift. It was a little messy but it worked! I also unmuted students for this part so the screaming was great!

We made sure Bible was last because (1) We want them to remember to bring their Bibles and (2) our one announcement involved a Bible Challenge!

Announcements

I had one announcement for our students: our 40-day Bible Challenge!

Prayer

  • We wanted to utilize our Prayer time to teach students that while washing your hands, the Lord’s Prayer is the perfect amount of time!
  • Link to our video. Again, I used my iPhone to film, iMovie on my mac to edit and Canva to add the images.

Teaching

In Middle School, we used this FREE SERIES by Grow!

In High School, we did the Easter Series by Orange.

Small Groups

  • While the teaching video was playing, we sorted people into Breakout Groups!
    • With 100 students, this was TOUGH. So next week I’m going to have people put their grade in their name to help me sort better. I try to think I’m a hero, but it’s hard remembering 100 people’s last names and grades, and some students had “iPhone” or “cat luvr” as their name!
  • I gave the Leaders the Small Group Guide in advance, but I also dropped it into the Chat. Some of the students thought it was hilarious and downloaded it, too.
  • I unmuted everyone and turned their muting/unmuting permissions back on.
  • I told leaders that whenever their small group was done, that their group could leave. Some groups stayed longer than others!

I would LOVE TO HEAR what worked for you. I’m no expert. but today went well!

Turning 30: How I Survived My 20s

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As I approach my 30th birthday on Friday, I’ve been feeling particularly nostalgic about my 20s. This has been a huge decade of growth for me in every way that I could possibly imagine; and while I know this is to be expected for anyone in their 20s, for me it feels different.

Ten years ago, I was in my sophomore year of college. I was a broken, hurt shell of a human being. I found relationships hard, because I had extreme abandonment issues that I hadn’t yet put words behind. I was too intense of a person to build relationships with anyone beyond my little tribe of people. I found it hard to connect and had a bitter and heavy heart. I loved the Lord and knew I wanted to serve Him, but also felt like life had dealt me a crappy hand and that no one understood me. I knew that I was gifted, but nobody had ever really told me that. I covered my body in baggy clothes, because I didn’t want to be seen and yet that was the only thing I wanted.

A few weeks ago, in a phone conversation with my little sister, she said to me, “So Heather. I turn 24 this year. And that puts me in my mid-20s. I’ve never really thought about what it’s like to be in your mid or upper 20s. I mean, I know what it’s like to be young, but mentally I just thought you skipped right from college into your 30s. Do you have any advice for surviving your 20s?”

At first I thought that this was the most ridiculous conversation I could possibly have with my baby sister. She knows I’m turning a whole decade older this year, right? And she’s worried about turning 24? But then I realized that she’s totally right, and many of the conversations I have with my friends and volunteers who are younger than me revolve around surviving this thing called your 20s. You see, I’ve spent the last ten years hearing from people “Oh, to be young again…”

But you know what? Screw that. My 20s were tough. And my sister was turning to the right person. I gave her three points of advice; points that I’d love to share with you:

1. Get a real job.

I’m not against travelling if you have that privilege, and I’m certainly not against taking some time to figure out what you’re good at or what you like. My sister is in that stage right now, and I have mad respect for it.

But at a certain point, you have to find a real job, get real experience, wake up at a real time, and report to a real supervisor for real coaching. And that helps you understand who you are as a person, because you’re learning to manage conflicts and programs and people as you seek to become more than a number, but a person with a career.

And, you know, bonus points for moving and finding who you are in a new city with new people. It is incredibly stretching to start over from scratch.

2. Find a Therapist.

A former supervisor, who I thought must have had the most perfect family life, once told me “your 20s are about figuring out what happened to you in your childhood.” Therapy is a huge piece of that. No matter what your family life was like, you owe it to yourself to talk about it with a licensed professional who can help you understand your growth barriers.

For me, it was imperative. I began seeing a therapist when I was 27. Originally I thought I was going to therapy because my job wasn’t the happiest at the time. But what I found out during therapy was that I was freaking out because I had fallen in love — and I had some major vulnerability issues as a result of abandonment. Fun stuff.

In addition to therapy, I went on an endless journey of self-discovery. I studied Strengthsfinder and the Enneagram to get a sense of who I am and what my gifts are. For me, this was redeeming. The things that I saw in myself as weakness, I began to see as pieces of God’s image in me. And it was freeing! And it helped me relate better to people who weren’t like me.

3. Date, but don’t feel like you have to settle down.

I didn’t begin dating until I was 24 years old. I was in a new city, and I didn’t know a single person outside of the church I had just started working in.

I dated aggressively, and I did so because I was on a journey to figure out who I was and what I wanted from a partner. I knew I wanted to get married someday, especially since being raised evangelical I had expected to be married and have 2 kids by the time I was 24.

But I’m GLAD that I waited until I had a better grasp of who I was as a person. You are constantly morphing throughout your 20s, which is why so many of my friends who married immediately after Bible college have already separated from their spouse. It takes a lot of time to figure out who you are, and you should never feel like you have to “make it work” with someone when either of you has no clue.

When I met my current partner, he was 34 and I was 26. I knew that I valued consistency, integrity, and humor — but a few years prior, I valued height, a high Biblical literacy, and someone who’d lead while I follow (vom). If I had gone with who I thought I wanted, I would end up with a tall tool who used the Bible to place me in the kitchen. I ended up with a partner who taught me the value of teamwork and makes me laugh and loves the Lord but also loves watching me shine. Thanks, Jesus, for that one.

These are the ways I survived my 20s — three simplistic, but difficult methods of finding myself. I am really proud of how far I’ve come: I’ve built deep relationships, including a spouse who I can be authentically and 100% myself with. I don’t live my life angry and bitter, and I’ve learned to wield my righteous anger into a power that gets stuff done for the sake of others. And generally speaking, I am an optimist; when 10 years ago I was a skeptic. I’ve also come to love myself completely. I look in the mirror and I like myself… some would even say my confidence needs to be dialed back. Last, I know what I want to do with my life — professionally but also personally. I can see my goals clearer than ever before.

As I look forward to my 30s, I often hear it’s the best decade of our lives. I hope so. I know that a lot of changes are on the horizon, with more stretching and growth bound to follow . But I also know that I am on a journey to be my best self. And if God can do this much in ten years of my life, who knows what’s ahead?!

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This is a picture from my 20th birthday party, and I can’t think of a better picture! This is one of my dearest friends, who has been with me in this decade of growth.

Bob Ross Painting Night!

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Hi friends!

It has been a LONG TIME since I have posted, HOWEVER I did something really cool with students at our Overnighter last month, and I wanted to share it with you here!

First of all — I LOVE Overnighters, and I realize I’m overdue with an “official” post on why they are so great, and what we do at them! But the basic trick to them is this: scheduling something every hourish to keep students engaged. This year, we added “Bob Ross” hour at 2am! That’s right, 100 middle schoolers were invited to paint along to a Bob Ross Video at TWO A.M. And you know what? It was a SUCCESS!

HERE’S HOW I PREPPED:

The most important part was choosing the right video. I wanted it to be simple enough we could follow along — especially since “real” painters use a variety of brushes and paint colors. Here is the video I chose:

HERE’S WHAT I PURCHASED:

  • Paint Tray Palettes. You could also, of course, use paper plates — but this was a really easy way for us to issue paint to students!
  • Spatulas. We also used plastic knives too — which worked just fine.
  • Fan Brushes. This is a variety pack — the size differences did not seem to matter.
  • Acrylic paint. Bob uses oil paint, but that was not realistic when painting with students. I purchased 3 cases for around 65 paintings. We only used one, and maybe an additional white.
  • One-inch brushes. Bob uses 2-inch brushes, but since we use a very tiny canvas, this worked better for us!
  • 8×10 Canvas – This was the best bang for our buck, and worked just fine for our paintings. Each size item we purchased accompanied this size canvas perfectly.
  • Flat Brushes – I don’t think Bob actually uses anything like this, but it’s nice to have a “normal” paint brush.

HERE’S WHAT WE DID:

  • On each table, we set up cups of water, paper towels, and extra plates so that students could use them to blend colors
  • We learned the hard way: You should also put down plastic tablecloths or butcher paper.
  • On the Palettes, we put white in the center. Then we used the rest of the colors for the other holes. The only colors you don’t need are pink and orange. We also had adults do this — it was easier to create an assembly line than have students do theirs themselves.
  • We passed out canvas and permanent markers first and told students to sign their names on the back. The canvases we used give space for students to even name their paintings!
  • I led this activity, and painted along. I would tell students to listen to Bob fully, then I’d pause it after he did something and allow students to catch up.
  • We let students “skip” painting the parts that they didn’t love. As it gets to the end and Bob starts doing the bushes and the path, it doesn’t make sense at first. This would be an awesome thing to preach on, if you have a message that evening! Sometimes you can’t see what God is doing, but if you go along with it you might get something beautiful and unexpected.

Here is a look at my painting (the best art I’ve ever done!) and a few other pictures of our activity!

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I would 10/10 do again! We finished around 3am, and they were dried and ready by 7am. We had several kids get frustrated (our boys, let’s be honest) and trashed so they could play foosball or “reinterpreted” their paintings, as you can see. But overall, everyone loved the activity.

Recreating the Price is Right

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“Price is Right” has to be one of the funnest themes I’ve come up with for an event; although I was very surprised that our students didn’t all know what Price is Right is.

ABOUT OUR EVENT

Our theme was a part of a “DNow Weekend,” another way to say an at-home retreat where students sleep at the church and/or host homes. Price is Right is the way our chapel was decorated, and we played Price is Right games at the beginning of our services. Our curriculum for the weekend was Priceless by LeaderTreks. You will see that I left a review expressing exactly what I thought of this curriculum as-is: it was very heavy on “spiritual bullying” and helping students identify and express times they were spiritually bullied. I thought it was entirely inappropriate. So we adapted it heavily for our context.

PRICE IS RIGHT GAMES

Some of the games I made, and some a volunteer made. Here are the games we did, as well as their accompanying prizes, since that is such an important part of Price is Right.

Some vocabulary: “One Bid” is the first piece of Price is Right, where a prize is shown, and the contestants guess the closest price without going over. “Game” is the game that follows. “Showcase ShowDown” is the very end, where there is a plethora of prizes. We had three sessions, so we did 3 games + spun the wheel at the first two to get our finalists for the Showcase Showdown at session 3.

A volunteer made our giant wheel out of PVC, foam, and plastic tablecloth. It was really attractive from far away, ha! We wanted to make things so that we could easily dispose of them after, as we don’t have the space (and I’m sure you don’t either) for a giant Price is Right Wheel. She made Plinko so it, too, could be disposed of. Everything else I made using posterboard or foam board and paper. It was seriously SO simple.

LAST: I played Price is Right Sounds the entire “show.” When contestants would “come on down!” When they’d win a game, lose a game. I spent a TON of time getting the game show just right in ProPresenter. It takes some time — but done well, it’s a blast!

Session One

ONE BID: Alarm Clock on Wheels (39.99)PRIZE DESCRIPTION: Waiting for the best wake up call ever? Never be late with Clocky, the only bedside alarm clock that will run away, hide, roll, wheel, beep, and jump up to a 3 feet. He is cool, fun, annoying, unique, a bit crazy and guaranteed to get you up on time. Moves, shakes, runs, changes directions. You will get up to turn Clocky off! Battery operated (4 AAA Lithium batteries, not included)
Set-up: I cut posterboards into thinner pieces and gave students markers to write their guesses on
GAME ONE: Shell GameGAME DESCRIPTION: Four gift cards are presented to the contestant. The contestant must determine which of the four has actually money on it, which they will win!SET-UP: Use four gift cards (get three from the recycling area that are empty).
ONE BID: Longboard (52.99)PRIZE DESCRIPTION: The Volador 42-Inch Freeride longboard has some revolutionary techs in skateboard engineering. Cold pressed 8-ply hardrock maple is strong enough to hold 220 lbs, while symmetrical camber concave deck is shock absorbent, super flexible, and saves trouble in adjusting posture. Ride around on your new longboard today!
GAME TWO: SWITCHGAME DESCRIPTION: Two prizes are shown to the contestant, each with a price. The contestant must determine whether the prices are with the correct prizes or whether the prices should be switched. If successful, the contestant wins both prizes.

PRIZE DESCRIPTIONS: We have two books for you: the first is

97 things to do before you finish high school – Being in high school is about a lot more than going to high school. It’s about discovering new places, new hobbies, and new people―and opening your eyes to the world. This book is about the stuff they don’t teach you in high school, like how to host a film festival, plan your first road trip, make a podcast, or write a manifesto. Whatever your creative, social, or academic inclinations, you’ll find 97 ways on these pages to amuse, educate, and interest yourself, and your friends. Because your life doesn’t stop at 3pm each day―it just gets started.

Wreck this Journal – For anyone who’s ever had trouble starting, keeping, or finishing a journal or sketchbook comes this expanded edition of Wreck This Journal, a subversive illustrated book that challenges readers to muster up their best mistake- and mess-making abilities to fill the pages of the book—or destroy them. Through a series of creative and quirky prompts, journalers engage in destructive acts—poking holes through pages, adding photos and defacing them, painting pages with coffee, coloring outside the lines, and more—in order to experience the true creative process.
SET-UP: Put prices on large paper – use painters tape to adhere to the table, and place prices above it.
ONE BID: Ukelele (36.93)PRIZE DESCRIPTION: THIS Traditional Soprano ukulele takes its design from traditional hawaiian body ornamentation, including nylon strings, a maple bridge, nickel silver frets, and guitar-style gears. Partnered with a carrying case, you can join the Uke Craze!
GAME THREE: PlinkoGAME DESCRIPTION: The contestant must correctly answer true/false questions to earn Plinko chips. The contestant then takes their chips to the top of a game board and releases them, one at a time, into slots at the bottom of the board containing money amounts. Those money amounts will be awarded in their Fundrasing accounts, to be used for future events.SET-UP: Place increments of $1, 5, $10, 20, 25 with $50 in center.
GIANT WHEELGAME DESCRIPTION: Each winner of the last three games will have a chance to spin the wheel. The person who gets closer to $1 with two spins will go on to the Showcase Showdown. If you hit $1, you will win a Free Overnighter this December.

Session Two

ONE BID – Bluetooth Speaker (28.89)PRIZE DESCRIPTION: This ultra-lightweight and portable bluetooth speaker has 11 Visual LED Display Modes that pulsate to create amazing light shows as you play music from your decice.
GAME ONE: Clip – Line Em UpGAME DESCRIPTION: The contestant must use the numbers to fill in the middle three digits in the price of a car. After the first attempt, the contestant is told how many digits are correct. The contestant has two attempts to complete the price of the car.

PRIZE DESCRIPTION: When it’s finally time to kick your shoes off and relax in the shade, you don’t want to lay on the hard ground or sit upright in stiff chair. That’s why we created the MalloMe XL Double Camping Hammock that lets you float effortlessly in the air, fully stretched out and embracing what true comfort means. Great for your backyard or camping trip, this portable, extra-large outdoor hammock helps your stresses fall away as you swing gently in the warm, summer breeze. (price: 16.99)
HOW TO MAKE: Use a foam core or posterboard as the basis, and use paper strips so they can slide the numbers
ONE BID: Lightning Reloaded (Shocking Game) (16.99)PRIZE DESCRIPTION: Add some zap to your next party or play shocking pranks on your friends with Lightning Reaction Reloaded. Bust out this shocking game for an electrifying good time. Lightning Reaction Reloaded is an electric shock game for teens and adults. It is not intended for use for children under 14 years of age. Requires 3 AAA batteries – NOT INCLUDED.
GAME TWO: Punch-A-Bunch
GAME DESCRIPTION: The contestant has an opportunity to punch as many times as they’d like to retrieve prizes. HOWEVER — hidden in these prizes are BUSTED cards. If you hit a BUSTED card, you must give up all the prizes that you won.

PRIZE DESCRIPTION: Hidden in this game are St. Luke’s Pop-Sockets, candy bars, gift cards, stickers, and more surprizes! Just don’t get BUSTED.
HOW TO MAKE: http://familyreunionhelper.com/blog/2018/04/punch-a-bunch-party-game-diy/
ONE BID: Snack Mix (19.99)PRIZE DESCRIPTION: The ultimate snack care package provides a 40-count variety of salty and sweet flavors, cookies, crackers, chips, popcorn, nuts and pretzels. Share this package of Frito-Lay snacks with your small group tonight, or hide under your bed from your parents later.
GAME THREE: PlinkoGAME DESCRIPTION: The contestant must correctly answer true/false questions to earn Plinko chips. The contestant then takes their chips to the top of a game board and releases them, one at a time, into slots at the bottom of the board containing money amounts. Those money amounts will be awarded in their Fundrasing accounts, to be used for future events.SET-UP: Place increments of $1, 5, $10, 20, 25 with $50 in center.
GIANT WHEELGAME DESCRIPTION: Each winner of the last three games will have a chance to spin the wheel. The person who gets closer to $1 with two spins will go on to the Showcase Showdown. If you hit $1, you will win a Free Overnighter this December.

Session Three: Showcase Showdown

GAME DESCRIPTION: Each contestant will have a shot at a showcase. You can choose to bid on this, or pass. The person with the closest guess wins their showcase! If you get within $1, you win BOTH showcases.

SHOWCASE ONE: VSCO GirlPrice: 89.94PRIZE DESCRIPTION: Our first showcase is a VISCO Girls Starter Kit! Sssk, Sssk, Ssk. This kit includes a friendship bracelet making kit, a variety pack of 9 chokers and shell necklaces, and 40 scunchies for each day of the month. But don’t forget to save the turtles! You’ll also recieve two reusable straws and stickers to decorate your brand new HYDRO-FLASK! SSK, SSK, And I oop!
SHOWCASE TWO: Room PackPrice: 116.92PRIZE DESCRIPTION: Looking to re-make your room? You can do that with you very own mini-fridge to keep up to 6 cans of pop cold at a time. Shoot some hoops on your new basketball hoop, or learn new skills on a magnetic dart board! Last, take a seat and relax on your very own circle chair.

Now for some pictures! You may have to zoom in to see the shell game, the wheel, and the “Switch” up close… but I promise: I literally placed cardboard and colorful tablecloth to make those game tables. For the front table that the contestants “bid” from, I used metallic fringe. We also placed the fringe around the room, where it made the most sense. We placed the names of all students into a bucket and drew names for the “One Bid” although you could use Sidekick by Download Youth Ministry to choose names!

I changed my mind.

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This week, the UMC denomination that I serve in voted to strengthen its stance on “self-avowed homosexuals.” And I was disappointed. Broken.

But I haven’t always been this way.

I grew up in a Southern Baptist church, and although it was conservative, the message that rang was “Jesus loves you!” I grew up hearing it constantly, which is what drew me to the church: hearing that Jesus loved me was needed in my life.

It wasn’t until my last few years of high school I heard “Jesus loves you, except…” We had a new pastor, and although my previous pastors probably had the same beliefs, this pastor was more vocal about who Jesus had beef with. And the people who Jesus has the most beef with, according to many Christians, are those living in sexual sin, especially the homosexuals.

When I went to college, I signed a contract that, among other things, said I couldn’t partake in, and I quote: “pre-marital sex, extra-marital sex, and homosexual relations.” I always thought that was an odd way to say it — like, implying that gay people can’t have sex, or even if you like, kiss another person of the same gender, you’re out.

There were a few people from my college who hid their sexuality, one of my childhood friends included. And I remember praying the gay away because I was worried about their salvation.

My college was protested against by an organization called SoulForce. They went on an “equality ride” around the country to different colleges that had anti-LGBTQ doctrine, like mine. At the time, I still agreed with the “traditional” stance on marriage, but I also knew that these people deserved a friend. Being the only girl who wanted to be a pastor and not marry a pastor at a Southern Baptist college meant I had some enemies of my own. I knew what it was like to be told “Jesus loves you, except…” So, I signed up to be a student ambassador for the university.

The Equality Ride changed my life, but it didn’t change my mind. I did become curious, though, especially about a trans woman named “Mia TuMutch.” She gave herself that last name/stage name because she’d always been told that she’s “too much.” And I have too (literally a trigger of mine). I attached myself to her, and listened. We became friends on Facebook, and I’ve watched her journey unfold into now working in politics and with trans youth. She always inspired me, even before I agreed with her.

After college, I found myself in a pickle. I had been fortunate enough to find work in a Southern Baptist church for my first Youth Director job, but it became clear that I wasn’t going to find another opportunity like that as a woman. So, I began looking outside of my denomination.

When I was hired at St. Luke’s UMC, one of the questions they asked me from the very first interview was how I would deal with LGBTQ youth. I was honest: I wasn’t sure how I felt theologically about homosexuality. But what I knew was this: teenagers are always shifting, always changing, on the never-ending hunt to find themselves. And I promised the hiring team that no matter who that teen was, I would love them and welcome them. That’s all I had — not theological answers, just love.

And I was hired.

Three months in, I heard my first pro-LGBTQ sermon. Also, let’s pause: I was also meeting my first woman pastors. So, like, I was in quite the whirlwind.

After I heard our senior pastor preach a sermon on how biblical interpretation leads us to believe that being gay is not a sin, I was shook. I went to my boss’s office the next day and wept. I confessed that I wasn’t as progressive as I thought I was, and I was worried I’d be fired because I didn’t have the same Biblical interpretation on this subject as the church. But my boss asked me: how are you going to treat our kids? And I said — with love and acceptance. And my boss told me that was all that mattered. I was worried I’d be fired, and he told me that I technically was in line with the Book of Discipline, and couldn’t get fired for that.

This was five years ago.

A few months later, we hired our first “out” gay employee. She was loud, she was proud.

And she was kind.

She was an ordained pastor in another denomination, but took a break to serve our church in a non-pastoral role.

Until one day, in Staff Chapel, our Senior Pastor asked her to assist with Communion.

Growing up, Communion Lord’s Supper was a time between you and the Lord. You took this time to repent and to check your heart. We were taught that if you had unrepentant sin, that you should go correct it before taking Lord’s Supper. It was a big deal — a time to pray and get real with the Lord.

As she was going around the circle, serving each staff member by name, I began to panic.

How could I take Communion from a sinner?

And that is when I changed my mind. I looked at this woman’s actions and words and recognized that she worked harder at her relationship with Christ than I did. I realized the fruit in her life was evident. And that’s when I decided that it must be okay to be gay and a Christian.

So I drank the kool-aid. Well, holy grape juice.

This was just four years ago.

In the last four years since, God has just gifted me with members of the LGBTQ community who have helped me grow my understanding and my heart. I “came out” as LGBTQ-inclusive just three years ago when writing an article for a prominent youth ministry site — the first positive article on the topic they’d ever had.

And to be honest, I’ve remained fairly silent since. But I won’t be silent any more.

To be silent would be to deny my trans cousin of the truth I’ve known since we were little. To be silent would be unfair to my friends who braved Baptist College, despite signing a contract that said they were unnatural. To be silent would be to disrespect the promise of unconditional love I’ve given so many students. And to be silent would crush one of my dearest friends, who came out to me on her couch two years ago, who I helped build her dating profile and personally swiped right on her girlfriend, and who is now in seminary.

I’m really heart-broken by what happened in General Conference last week. Like, shaking-sleepless-sick-shocked broken. I am dreading church tomorrow for the first time in 5 years. I am especially dreading telling our 8th graders that the letters they wrote to our delegates asking for more progressive doctrine failed. I don’t want to admit that we failed them.

But I have hope: 9 years ago, I thought everyone who wasn’t a Southern Baptist was going to hell. Today, I study the fruit from everyone I meet and judge them based on that, not their labels. 5 years ago, I sought refuge to lead in a church. Today, I admire the faith of gay Christians who fight to do the same. 4 years ago, I changed my mind. Today, I choose to speak my mind.