Author: Heather Lea Campbell

Why I Work With Teenagers

leadership, youth ministry

Update: This post was nominated for YouthMin.Org’s “Best Youth Ministry Blog Post of 2012” contest. I made it all the way to the top 34, and was in 17th place, too short to make it to the Sweet Sixteen! I am blessed to have been nominated, and hope that you have been blessed by this post.

 

I love youth ministry. I just love it. I blog about it, tweet about, study it, think about it, pray about it, etc.  I just love it.

I’m currently working in a residential ministry where I work with older teenage girls who are trying to learn practical skills to transition into the adult world.  It’s a challenge in many ways,  but residential ministry has provided some of the most raw ministry I have ever experienced–not many of my youth minister friends can recount moments where they’ve had runaways, experienced a teenager attempting suicide, physically dangerous altercations, or teens in their face screaming obscenities…all while living in the same house as them.  I’m daily struggling to model grace to people who daily fail me.  Yet I really can’t picture myself not working with teenagers.

I’ve heard many times (especially from teens who are in state care) “Why do you work with teenagers?”  I usually brush it off and say “I like it” or “I don’t know” or the occasional “I can take the abuse.”  But this week I really thought about it.

I was called to youth ministry at the age of 17, while volunteering in the youth ministry in my church.  It was others’ conviction in my church that even made me aware of this calling.  I fought it, but came to the conclusion that it was God’s will.  I didn’t understand it, but ever since I’ve been devoted and have realized that I have natural and spiritual giftings that have placed me in this ministry.

But WHY do I like it?  WHY do I do ministry?  It’s not just because I want to give the Gospel–I could be an evangelist, a writer, or even a worker at Walmart.  It’s not that.

It’s not because I like working with teenagers, either.  I mean, I love them, don’t get me wrong.  But this is a hard ministry–teenagers can be manipulative, and there are always hard moments when one has failed you. Emotionally, this is a taxing ministry.  There are days when all I can do is pop in the second VHS of Titanic and cry the night away because of something that has happened.

It’s also not because I think the church is a great place to work either.  I believe in the church, I am devoted to the Church as a whole and to the church community.  But church can be a messy place to work.

So, I’m sure you’re thinking by now “This girl is not called.  She isn’t in it for the Gospel, because teenagers are rewarding, or because she believes in the church.”  I didn’t say that exactly.  I am in it for all those things, but they aren’t the reason I like working with teenagers.  At the end of the day those reasons aren’t the reasons that keep me going.  Maybe I’m wrong for that.

When I was a teenager, I had a rough life.  I had absent parents in an urban community where I was easiy influenced and made bad decisions.  I had to make it through myself–figure out how to cook, clean, drive, pay for college, etc.  More than that, I had to learn what it looks like to have a relationship with Jesus Christ.    I had very few positive influences in my life, and really relied on God alone to get me through a lot of situations and had to find my own resources when it came to practical needs.  What I love about youth ministry is making a difference in lives that need the difference; being that consistent mentor and provider for someone.  I love it when I can teach a teenager a new skill, whether it’s a new meal to prepare, a fun word in Spanish, or a concept in the Bible.  I love being a sounding board for problems and being a constant source of confidentiality.  I love providing teenagers with resources so that they can better their lives.

This is why I love working with teenagers–to give them someone that I didn’t have.  This is also why it’s crucial for me to act with integrity and consistency.

We all have something special that we bring to the youth ministry table, something unique that helps us connect to our students.  I challenge you to think about why you love working with teenagers.  Let’s be honest, there are reasons deeper than “spreading the gospel” or “loving the church.”  Because there are easier ways to do that than working with teenagers.  And it’s not “loving teenagers” that is the sole reason why we do ministry; because teenagers break our hearts no matter if you work in a church, a school, or as a parent.  Why is it?  I would love to hear your reasons :)

5,000 views! And a Chicken Dinner

Blogs about Heather

My blog recently hit the 5,000 mark in views!  I don’t know why anyone would even want to read it, but I guess I might say something ingenious every once in a while ;) And out of humility…:)

I recently got a job with the Missouri Baptist Children’s Home.  I work in a Transitional Living Program, helping teen girls ages 16-20 gain skills for independence.  I live with the girls for a week, and then am off a week.  I love it, but desire to get back into a church.  I keep reminding myself that ministry doesn’t just happen in a church building, and am blessed to work for a Christian organization that views my role AS ministry.  Of course, I have some crazy days and moments, but I love teenagers and love living life with them.  How better to show them Christ?

I’m also writing a guest post for youthmin.org on women in youth ministry…this is an extremely broad post, and I’m trying to figure out how to fit all I have to say into one post.  It’s impossible, I’ve decided.  Mostly because how can I condense the gender stereotypes, the personal hits I’ve taken, and a Biblical view of leadership all in once post?  How can I even explain these things?  And also, I think that my self-worth is down a little, because I’m no longer serving in the church-context like I was.  I so desire to get back to it!  I explain that it’s like this:

Say you’ve been promised a steak dinner–with loaded mashed potatoes and cherry cobbler for dessert.  You don’t know when it’s coming, but you want it soooo bad.  You sit down for dinner and you get a nice chicken dinner.  It’s delicious, and good for you, but in the back of your mind is that steak dinner.  It’s like you can’t fully appreciate what’s in front of you, even though it’s good.  In the back of your mind is that dream.

That is how I feel.  I really want that steak-dinner job, but I’ll have to “settle” for my chicken-dinner job.  Which is still great!  But I know what I truly desire and can’t wait for it.

And that’s what it’s all about (Church)

christianity, church, discipleship, friendship

It’s okay to go to church to see your friends.

I’ve always been told this is the wrong reason to want to go. I always told people it was the wrong reason.

But then it hit me.
Why else go?
You can pray at home.
You can worship at home.
You can read scriptures at home.
You can listen to a preacher at home.
You can grow closer to God at home.
Church isn’t for any of these things.  Yes, these things happen.  Yes, they are a part of it.  But going to church is about meeting with a community of believers to do these things and so much more.  And going to church isn’t the end of it…God calls us to live in community with His believers 24/7.  That means calling, meeting, and praying with and for one another.  And the church should end up being a place to see your most dear friends.
That is what church is about.

Discipling Disciples

christianity, church, discipleship, friendship, youth ministry

This weekend I met with my mentor.  And I always have to blog afterwards.
I was meeting my mentor at Dairy Queen, because one of the girls I spent a lot of one-on-one discipleship with at the last church I served at worked there, and I was in town visiting people.  As I was standing there waiting for Lydia (my mentor) to arrive, I thought about how funny it was that Mackenzie (the young lady I was invested in) had no idea of the impact Lydia has made on her life.  I told Lydia this, and she told me that she recently went to her mentor’s wedding and met her mentor’s mentor and was thinking the same thing.  So now Mackenzie has four generations of mentors accounted for above her.  I told Mackenzie, and she kind of shrugged it off (I mean, she’s 16 and was at work) but I think she thought it was pretty cool.
Visiting my college town the weekend before their classes started was strange for me.  I drove past a campus event, and looked out at all the fresh faces.  It was so strange to be around during freshmen orientation, and not have any “plan” or even excitement about the possibilities of investing in futures students… but I realized that’s why I discipled new students, so they could disciple the next line of students, and so on and so forth.
This is discipleship: equipping disciples to disciple.  We are called to be students and teachers at the same time.  When you think about the people you are investing in, think about the opportunities they have to invest in others! The thought is exciting!  I think about the students I mentor, and how they have friends, siblings, coworkers, even parents that they can invest in and bring truth to.  When you invest in one person, you literally have access to investing into the world.  Bam.  Exciting.

Don’t just "understand" the other side, EMPATHIZE.

america, Blogs about Heather, christianity, church, faith, freedom, leadership, lgbtq, love, sin, social activism, theology, unchurched
I have half a dozen or so documents in my laptop right now of “potential blogposts” of different rants and ramblings about politics; from Chick-Fil-A to the ability for a Christian to vote different political parties to my stance on gay marriage, I have been wanting to speak out for a while now.  But I have held back.  Why?  Because there are others who can say it better.  Because I’m no expert.  Because I’m still learning.

That is what I want to emphasize today in my all-encompassing post on politics, ethics, and anything else that seems to matter these days.  I am extremely irritated with the election, as both “sides” of the United States are exposing their dirty ignorance and disregard for people who do not agree with them.  It is this mentality of, “If a person does not agree with my political stance, which is the only way, then their entire character must be attacked publicly.”  One day I posted on Facebook, “I think it says a lot about President Obama’s character for him to visit Joplin a year after the tornado came through.”  I wasn’t making a political statement, just a statement of appreciation for the remembrance of a small town near me that had been devastated by a storm.  One parent of one of my youth wrote, “I think we should all worry about Heather’s character.”  Then a full-fledged debate began on my status about gay marriage, Obama being a dirty Muslim from Kenya, etc.  One of my friends wrote, “Shame on all of you.  This status wasn’t about any of that.”  And it wasn’t, but to many Christian brothers and sisters that I respect, a politician that they don’t agree with can’t have any redeeming qualities.

I think it’s extremely dangerous to claim to hold absolute knowledge of any subject.  I’m sure some of you are shocked, as I am a Christian and you probably are too; how can I say that I don’t know undoubtedly that God exists?  Simply, if I knew it wouldn’t be called faith.  I know it in my heart, but empirically I do not know that.  I’m not a skeptic, and I’m not saying that if I don’t know things, that I can’t express my opinions on them; in fact my faith in God precedes all other faiths I have and consequentially demands me to express that faith.  The point I’m trying to make is:  It is extremely important to be empathetic to opinions that differ from your own, for you do not know your opinions to be fact.  In fact, it becomes dangerous when you claim to know it all and aren’t empathetic.

Why?  Because once you claim to hold the key to knowledge on a particular subject, you get arrogant.  You push people away from you with your words and your attitude.  For example:  Those Christians who are outspoken about gay marriage push people who agree with it away; it scars the LGBTQQ community and its allies and pushes people away from the Christ who ate meals with prostitutes, tax collectors, and the self-righteous.  Christians (and everyone else) definitely have the right to discuss their opinions and alleged knowledge on a subject; but if we aren’t empathetic of the other side, we can and will push them away.  I took some time trying to understand the LGBTQQ community a few years ago when a group came to my conservative Christian university to speak out against our allegedly persecuting contract that we had to sign in order to be a student there.  Instead of pushing my doctrine, I took the time to listen; a time of learning and growth.  Once I heard the stories of how they’ve been treated by people inside the Church, I began to understand that it’s not necessarily my place to indoctrinate a homosexual upon meeting them (and that’s just the beginning of that journey).  It went without being said what I believed.  I spent time trying to be empathetic, not with the sole goal of strengthening my argument, but because there were things on the other side of the debate that I never even considered.  And my opinion, although not perfected today, has come a long way.

I think this is also apparent in the Neo-Calvinist movement within the SBC, trying to take it back to its supposed Calvinistic roots and forcing churches to adhere to them and teach them as if it’s an essential truth in order to believe in God.  Every time I found out someone that I knew was a Calvinist, I would judge them.  I am currently very sympathetic to Calvinism, but took a long time telling anybody; I was fearful that I would be labeled as an arrogant, close-minded reformer like many of the Neo-Calvinist leaders are looked at. Also, I’m not 100% sure on any of it.  I once thought I was when I was anti-Calvinist, and then I read scriptures and listened to people and changed my mind.  I might change my mind again.  But more importantly, why is it necessary to be sure on this topic?  It cheapens God’s sovereignty in my claim that I am all-knowing on any subject.  When we become face-to-face before God, we’re going to learn that a lot of our political, ethical, and even religious beliefs were wrong (I honestly can’t wait for God to go, “Heather, remember how you were so arrogant about __? Well, you were wrong, and there’s grace for you because I was more important to you than even that.”).

This goes beyond politics and quarrels within the Church.  This comes to our everyday life.  It is well-heard, “Before you judge someone, walk in their shoes.”  I think it’s dangerous to form an opinion, and especially to claim knowledge of a subject, without hearing all sides.  More than hearing them, but understanding them (taking their place and walking in their shoes).  Understanding a side different than yours takes more than reading a few books or listening to a few podcasts.  It takes learning from people, talking with people.  This should be especially true within the church.  We are to be in community with one another, and it strongly discredits Christ’s love for the Church when we break off communion with one another on topics that we haven’t taken the time to understand.  Maybe that person is a Calvinist because they don’t believe they could have found God without Him choosing them.  Maybe that woman hates hymns because she didn’t make it past 8th grade and has a small vocabulary.  Maybe that man isn’t a fan of small groups because his last one gossiped the entire time.  Maybe that man doesn’t come to church on Sundays because the only job he can find works those days.  Maybe that woman is pro-choice because her sister could have died in a pregnancy.  Maybe that Christian man is a Democrat because the fight against social injustice overrides the need to ban gay marriage.  Maybe that lady is for gay marriage because she separates legal marriage from covenant relationships.  Instead of judging people, understand them.  You don’t have to agree, but you don’t even need to tell them that either (with proper discourse, that will naturally come in a non-pushy way).  You just need to see people the way Jesus sees them: broken, fallen, and beautiful.  Christ sees you that way too.  You are just as much His bride as the rest of the Church; in fact, you are His bride together and that entails the need for empathy.  And at the end of the day, if you still disagree with them, that doesn’t mean their entire character should be shattered, especially if they are a follower of Christ; if you agree on the essential truths of salvation, then you are still a part of the Church and should edify one another.

Occasionally, you are going to run into a person who says while debating with you, “I’m listening to you, but I’ve heard this all before.  I’ve thought through this topic and have my opinion.”  This translates, “I’m listening to your comments, but I already know all there is to know on the subject and there is no new information you can give me.  There is no point in debating me, because I won’t change my mind but will debunk all your arguments in the most mocking way I can.”  THIS. IS. DANGEROUS.  I can’t tell you how much I have thought through, prayed through, and talked through different topics.  I may have strong opinions on subjects, but the day I claim to have it all together: please take me out of the local church before I infect people with my arrogant ignorance. Can you tell I am hurting right now?  Yes.  Because I used to be the person who was arrogant to think that they knew it all and only struck up debates to be the smart conqueror of them.  Because right now, people are discrediting me for being provocative in thinking and trying to be the “Devil’s Advocate” and understand both sides of issues.  But primarily because in a world where we have tragedies such as mass murders, children starving, public shootings, and great moments of glory like the young people beast-moding the Olympics; we are more concerned about our disagreement with a single politician or company that supports an ethic stance that differs from ours than for understanding our brothers and sisters.

ps, as I finish this post, I’m like “what do I even name this?!” hah.

Trying to Find a Job in Student Ministry?

church, youth ministry

It’s weird that this is my most-viewed post, but here it is:

Trying to find a job in student ministry? It can seem overwhelming trying to decide where to start. Here are some starter points:

Email some of your connections; you may find you have more than you think:
  • professors from your university or seminary
  • the head of your area convention
  • past churches you have worked for, preached at, or been in any kind of connection with
  • youth pastors in other churches
Here are some organizations that help connect you to the right church.
Denomination Websites:
Here are search engines that are specifically related to finding church jobs:
Here are some “general” sites that combine most sites (like Monster, CareerBuilder, etc) into one for easy Job searches:
Look on Christian university websites:
Non-Profit Organizations
Camps

A special thanks to all of you who have been sending me sites to add to this list! Wouldn’t it just be easier if there was one place for all listings?

Using Twitter to Network in Ministry

media, networking, youth ministry

Some people don’t understand the “point” of Twitter.  I absolutely love Twitter.  Some use Twitter to get breaking news from sports teams, celebrities, and news corporations.  I do that.  Some use Twitter to post everything they are doing that day. I’ve occasionally done that.  Some use Twitter to be passive aggressive about something.  I’ve been guilty of that.

But my favorite usage of Twitter is networking, especially with others in Youth Ministry.  When I was in college, I was an officer in the Baptist Association of Christian Educators, a national organization of Christian educators dedicated to networking.  My position was to facilitate connections with others going into ministry within my university.  BACE became my and the other officers’ baby, as our understanding of the need of networking within ministry increased.  Why is networking with others in ministry important?  That’s simple.  Because ministry is relational; networking provides resources, encouragement, and communication.

Twitter is a great way to network.  You can connect with people without exposing your profile to “creepers” like on Facebook.  There are many people who I communicate with on Twitter that I wouldn’t “friend” on Facebook because they are two completely different kinds of networking.  Facebook is more for connecting with real-life friends.  Twitter is more for connecting with people who you may not have met in real life, but still gain some kind of relationship with without sharing too much personal information.

Here are some #TwitterTips for networking with others in ministry, thanks to Rachel Blom @youthleadersac, searching #TwitterTip, and some own interpretations and pet peeves…:

  • Follow religious leaders, other ministers from around the country/world, and teen news sources.  All three will give you a nice plethora of information.  Make “lists” on Twitter to keep track of different groups of people.
  • Be generous in retweeting others’ posts. It’s a compliment and builds connections.
  • Tweet a mixture of personal and professional tweets.  Why?  Because the professional tweets give people resources, the personal tweets give people a relationship.
  • Do not tweet your personal blog post multiple times a day.  Maybe twice, perhaps three times; but posting the same personal blog post more than that is grounds for the “unfollow” button.
  • Don’t make your personal Twitter your Twitter for your ministry group…if you tweet dozens of times a day, parents don’t want to read that.
  • Post prayer requests.  There are Twitter accounts dedicated to praying for youth pastors.
  • If a stranger legitimately replies to your post, respond! You’re not too good for any Twitter relationship (if the account is legit).
  • If you want your tweet retweeted, leave room so they can do so. When retweet others’ posts, add a comment so show then your appreciation.
  • #HASHTAG. This is how you will find people to network with.  Hashtagging makes it simple to find the kind of information you want and people to follow.  My favorites are #stumin, #youthmin, #uthmin, and #fammin
  • Post a variety of resources.  In my Twitter feed, you will see news stories, music to listen to, blogs, and products.  They are all related to Student Ministry, but there is a lot of different resources
  • Follow people who follow you. It’s just polite. And there must be some reason they want to follow you, so check that out.
  • Attracting followers means communicating with them.  Don’t expect to have 1000 followers if you don’t talk to any of them.
  • Put the type of people you want to follow you in your Bio. If you want to network with those in ministry, put you are in ministry. Simple.
  • Try tweeting at different times throughout the day and see when you get the biggest response.
  • Numbers aren’t everything. It can be pretty easy to gain hundreds of followers, but would you rather have numbers or community? (sounds like a Jesus Juke!)
  • Tweet people the way you would want them to tweet you.

There are many things I am missing. For more #TwitterTip, look up that hashtag on Twitter. Also, here are the official Twitter Rules.

Question: What #TwitterTips am I missing?

Let Freedom Ring

america, christianity, freedom

I have been reading through Acts recently, and as I read I grew more and more amazed at the way the disciples would proclaim the message of Christ and the Gospel. Not only were they bold about proclaiming it, but they did so in areas where they weren’t free to do so; they faced persecution countless times. When I compare this to Christians in America, I am surprised—we live in a culture that has freedom of speech and freedom of religion, yet I rarely see Christians spreading the gospel.

I even see Christians go overseas and risk their lives over there to spread the message of Christ more than I see Christians over here spreading the Gospel. And they don’t even have to risk their lives over here. There are so many people right here in our neighborhood that need to know grace and salvation. Yet we don’t spread that message.

We are so blessed to live in a country like the United States of America. I’m not saying that if we proclaim His name, we won’t be persecuted because of our freedoms. If we are proclaiming His name correctly, than naturally we should be persecuted; the message of the Gospel is completely counter-cultural and provocative. I want to proclaim Christ in a way that takes full advantage of my freedom of speech, and I want to see my brothers and sisters do the same thing.

Happy Independence Day! :)

What I miss about Youth Ministry

church, leadership, youth ministry

Two months ago, I quit my job as a youth minister at a church in order to follow God’s will and move back to St. Louis to help out with my family. The last two months has been an extremely interesting time for me, as I graduated college and moved in with my grandparents transitionally, assisted in the transferring of my sister’s custody from my parents, and am learning what it means to rest and not do anything. I am job-seeking and often discouraged, because I miss doing ministry and can’t see my life doing anything else.

 Here are some things I miss about doing youth ministry (in no particular order):

  • Sword fights with middle school boys. 
  • Being in a library surrounded by exegetical commentaries. 
  • Having crazy stories to tell my friends and anyone else I force to listen about this week’s hilarious thing that happened to me/a youth. 
  • Rolling my eyes as the girls seek out “potential suitors” for me 
  • Teaching thrice a week…I love teaching. 
  • Discipling teenage girls one-on-one. 
  • Answering relationship advice from boys. 
  • Getting random gifts.
  • Helping students through sin in their life. 
  • “Excuses/Reasons” to be constantly in the Word. 
  • Being invited over for home cooking.
  • Students making fun of me because my car makes weird noises. 
  • “Thirsty Thursdays”—picking up teens from school and going to Sonic for happy hour. 
  • Commenting on every single one of their Facebook statuses…haha 
  • Feeling essential in their life when they need prayer for someone I don’t even know. 
  • I even miss being used as a chauffeur when they want to go to a sports game or concert and “need a responsible adult” to go with them. 
  • All-nighters.
  • Forcing Christian rap upon impressionable students.
  • Conversations about spiritual gifts.
  • That moment when I throw out some Greek and the HS boys think I’m legit. 
  • Working through crazy analogies with students, like “spiritual pants.”  I still am unsure about that one. 
  • Challenging students.
  • Being made fun of because I’m from the “hood.”
  • Building relationships with parents. Definitely one of my favorite things. 
  • Coming to my pastor when I’m worn out and venting without his judgment and getting straight-up counsel.
  • Thirty Hour Famine, camp, VBS, missions projects, all that good stuff.
  • I even miss complaining. I must be crazy.
  • The cards, notes, Facebook posts/messages, and hugs of encouragement from parents and other adults in the church.
I love ministry, and yearn for that time when I can do it again! :)

My Identity Crisis

Blogs about Heather, faithfulness, identity, spiritual gifts

I’m a fresh graduate with a Bachelor’s of Science in Christian Ministry with an emphasis in Youth and a minor in Theology.

While that feels good to SAY, it’s not doing me much good right now.  In a leap of faith, or stupidity, or something like that, I moved back to St. Louis in order to help out with my family.  And while the last month has been fruitful in my relationship with my sister, moving her into my grandparents and giving her somebody constant for once in her life, I am still unemployed. I’m not one to not have anything to do; last year I was a full-time student, worked a draining job for 32+ hours a week, and also worked at a church.  So I was pretty stinking busy!  This month has been great, but I’m out of money, out of patience, and out of sanity.

It’s not all my fault that I’m unemployed, let’s be honest.  I’ve been offered three jobs, but I rejected them, knowing that there is SOMETHING out there that is hand-picked, God-ordained for me.  In my confusion, I applied for a Children’s Minister position in a very rich West County suburb of St. Louis.  Does any part of that sentence make sense to anyone?  I got very far in the process, and basically had it when I woke up one morning and said, “NO.”  What was I thinking?  I’ve been called to ministry with TEENAGERS.  My spiritual gifts of exhortation and teaching would be extremely overlooked in children’s ministry.  Could I have done a “good” job?  Of course.  But I wouldn’t be serving the body of Christ properly had I taken that job.  


All this to say, this summer has been CRAZY. I thought the identity crises would end when I exited college, but they seem to be even worse among me and my fellow college graduates!  It’s weird having a degree, and feeling like you have to beg someone to hire you.  It’s harder having a degree in ministry, knowing that God has called you to something and trying to be faithful to that; yet still not having a way to pay bills. But have I mentioned how faithful GOD has been?  He has been so faithful in providing all of my needs, and I am reminded of how He IS my identity, and all I really need is in Him.  I also humbly remind myself and my colleagues that ministry isn’t a position, but a calling.  I don’t need to be in a church to do ministry.  Ministry is my LIFE.


I have an interview on Tuesday with an organization that helps at-risk youth around STL.  I’m excited about the opportunity, yet sad because I have to start with an overnight position and try to work my way up.  But hey, it’s full-time, pretty good pay, plus I get benefits.  Not gonna complain if I get it!  And it’s better than the other jobs I’ve been offered, because I am confident that my gifts can be used to edify the Church, even if it’s not in a church.